A couple of weeks ago Jan was creaking to the Oldies.
It all started when her friend -- we'll call her P -- phoned and asked if Jan would like to go to a concert. Her neighbors had purchased 2 nonrefundable tickets but the wife was sick and they couldn't go. Well, Jan didn't think twice. She dumped us!
This is their evening, the way Jan tells it.
They left at 6 and arrived at 7:15, after watching the turns and road signs carefully, because they were directed via back roads and neither of them had been that way before. The concert started about 8:15. They were way up from the stage, but they had no problem hearing the music.
These are photos of the Beach Boys in concert. That's Mike Love, one of the founding members, in the long-sleeved striped shirt. He owns the rights to the Beach Boys name now. And long time -- real long time -- member Bruce Johnson is on the keyboard.
Sorry, the pix are so small.
Okay, we know you can't see them very well in these little pictures and many of you undoubtedly never saw them before. But the old folks -- oops, we mean the older kids know who they are. The seats were filled with older kids and younger kids who knew the words to the songs. And they'd all stand up and tap their toes or sway to the music. Jan spent so much time tapping her toes -- wait, Jan's backwards, she taps her heel -- to the music, she has had trouble standing or walking on that ankle ever since. But she had a great time.
As the concert ended, Jan and P took off at a fast trot for the parking lot -- way out in the parking lot. Jan did the math and knew they would be home by midnight. (Jan was correct, but there is always the unexpected.)
They made it out of the parking lot pretty quickly, then went straight through the light instead of turning left. They had to pull into a parking lot so P could review the directions and then they reversed direction and turned right. There was little traffic and they made good time. In fact, such good time that Jan was surprised when P suddenly turned right, explaining she almost missed the sign for some tiny little town she remembered from the trip to the concert.
Miles later they suddenly entered the little town. Only they hadn't come through it earlier, they had gone around it. The town was dark and deserted. Worse, there were no signs to tell them how to find the highway. The main road turned left and turned right and finally they reached a stop sign. But they couldn't figure out where they were, so they turned around and went back through the deserted town, turned around again and finally spied other humans. A young man and two young women.
P stopped and called out, Do you know how to get to .....?
One of the girls asked, Do you want the Interstate or the old route?
The Interstate, P said confidently. Jan couldn't remember being on the Interstate. In fact, if memory served her, it was on the other side of the city. But she wasn't driving, hadn't read the map....
A girl started giving directions. Go (back to the stop sign where they'd turned around) and turn right. Keep going for 10, 15, maybe 20 miles. It's a long way. The guy said to P, Don't worry, mama, you'll get there. As they drove away, P heard one of them ask, What are they doing out?
Back to the stop sign. P turned right. Jan suggested they go left since that was the general direction they were originally headed. After a little way, P turned around and headed back to the stop sign. A spit and a holler past the stop sign, they found their turnoff. The rest of the way would be a piece of cake.
Many, many miles later there was a huge car dealership. I don't remember seeing this before, Jan said. And sure enough, they'd missed their turn -- way back there somewhere. They wandered from here to there, pulled over to read the map, and turned around a couple or few times. There was virtually no traffic, not even a patrolling deputy they could stop, and not a single gas station.
They were relieved when they finally recognized the name of their town on a sign. Jan got out of P's car and wobbled across the lawn at 1:10 AM.
She had been gone for 7 hours and 10 minutes. This set us to thinking. Jan says things are not going well financially and we should find a job so we don't have to go to the shelter where -- well, we won't even think about that! But since humans are willing to go to that much trouble to spend time and money on entertainment, perhaps we should start giving concerts of our own. We're much younger and better looking than the Beach Boys!
We don't know how to play any instruments, but isn't that what canned music is for? Jan can stock up on cans, Buddy can howl, Merci can sing soprano, Sam can throw in his woofs and squeaks, and the JFF felines can sing harmony and backup.
Oh, and we have a picture of just the car to tour in. Can't you just see us rolling down the Interstate in the JFF Bluemobile, Buddy's ears flapping in the breeze!
We can't wait. Watch for us. We might be coming to your town. Not soon, though. Jan says we'll have to save us for cans and gas. Oh, and food. Singing must work up quite an appetite.