Wednesday, June 20, 2018

Our Wednesday Tuesday Post

Micah:  I'm so glad we are finally able to post.  I was afraid we were not going to make it for our Tuesday post.  But -

Rusty:  We didn't make it for our Tuesday post.  This is Wednesday.  Yesterday was Tuesday.

Micah:  Are you sure?  We're supposed to post on Tuesday.

Rusty:  I'm sure.  We were going to post but we've had internet problems again since last Friday and haven't been able to sign in, post comments or sometimes send email. 

Micah:  Oh, that's right.  Jan called our ISP Monday and they "fixed" it from their end but our speed was still so slow it was practically running backward much of the time and we couldn't hold a connection long enough to say hello, let alone write a post.

Rusty: It's supposed to be fixed today; however, yesterday the green high speed DSL cable came apart and Jan had to call back to ask for a replacement.  She was told to use the pre-high speed cable until it arrives.  So here we are typing on our blog using a regular old jack to DSL cable and, although our high speed is still on vacation, our internet is working.

Micah:  In that case, we can write our post.

Rusty:  Actually, we can't.

Micah:  But our DSL is semi-working.

Rusty:  Jan was very specific.  We can post on Tuesday and Friday.  This is Wednesday.  We can't post.

Micah:  Seriously?

Rusty:  Yes.

Micah:  **sigh**  In that case, we have no post for today since this is tomorrow instead of yesterday. 

Friday, June 15, 2018

Mini Bear in Icing

Cyndi:  Hey, Marcus, have you seen our recent house guest in icing yet?

Marcus:  I don't remember having a house guest in icing.  Is that a new fashion?

Cyndi:  No, silly, it's a cake a new member brought to the local Humane Society meeting Tuesday.  Actually, it's a cupcake cake.

Marcus:  I never heard of a cupcake cake.  Is it made of cake or cupcake batter?

Cyndi:   It's made from cupcakes and icing in whatever shape a customer wants. Jan thought it resembled Bear and took some pictures. 

Marcus:  Hey, that does resemble her somewhat, but it's hard to tell for sure.

Cyndi:  How can you say it might?  It looks like her!

Marcus:  It's hard to tell since the closest look I had of her was when she was on her back pummeling me on the nose for being polite.  (The Mini Bear)

Cyndi:  You're several times her size and you were trying to sniff her butt.  What did you expect?

Marcus: It was a misunderstanding. 

Cyndi:  Yes, it was.  I hope you learned a lesson.

Marcus:  What lesson?

Cyndi:  Never underestimate the ingenuity of a female!  You'll get kicked in the nose every time.

Tuesday, June 12, 2018

The Mini Bear

Merci:  Meet Bear.  Seriously, this is Bear the chihuahua mix.  She - yes, she!  (You have probably already guessed that Bear the female chihuahua was named by a guy.)  She stayed with us June 1 - 5.

Percy:  She was so quiet we hardly knew she was here at first, but the next day (Saturday) Jan and her friend Miss Teresa took Bear to visit her human at the nursing home, and Bear came back with ATTITUDE and a voice.

Merci:  When she was suddenly taken from her home and left here, she thought she was abandoned.  When Miss Teresa returned the next day and Bear spent time with her human, Bear changed from fearful to happy and hopeful.  Also, Bossy.

Percy:  Jan says if Bear were her dog, she'd rename Bear "Hope". She looks like a Hope, doesn't she!

Merci:  She loved to go outside and patrol the dog pen.  She'd walk back and forth, stand up for a better look in the neighbor's yard, resume patrol, sit in the shade where she had a panoramic view, resume patrol, say it was time to go in, take a leap onto the first step and bounce up the rest.

Marcus:  She did not like being crated.  Jan gave her the larger crate so she wouldn't feel cramped and she hated it.  I'm the bigger dog.  I should have had the larger crate.  But no, the mini bear got it!

Percy:  Jan let her have it so you wouldn't argue over her being in your crate.  When Cricket was here last year (Cricket Goes Home) , you didn't stop complaining about having to move out of your crate so she could have the smaller one.

Merci:  She had picked out a corner behind the desk Friday and Jan had blocked it with a gate so she could relax in private.   Then Jan blocked it with a keep her out with us, either in the crate or loose in the house, but not hiding in a corner. 

Marcus:  But after Bear returned Saturday, she figured out how to get back to "her" corner.  While Jan sat here at the computer, Bear accessed the bottom desk shelf from the open side and pushed things out the front for a private entrance.

Percy:  As hyper and noisy as Marcus is, he was a very good boy for the duration. Jan would let Bear out of the crate and when Bear went back in on her own, Jan would lock it and let Marcus out of his.  Jan claims playing musical crates and outside patrol is w-o-r-k!

Merci:  She also claims Bear and Marcus took about five years off her life when they accidentally met one day at the kitchen door.  Jan heard terrified screams, turned around in time to see Bear turn and run with Marcus right behind her.  Jan caught up to them on the enclosed porch.  Bear was on her back ...  Actually, Marcus should tell what happened.

Marcus:  Bear hasn't been around other dogs and obviously didn't know proper canine etiquette because she was just plain RUDE!  I was following Jan into the kitchen when Bear, who was supposed to be sleeping in her corner, suddenly tried to pass me.  Being the polite guy I am, I started to say hello - the canine way by sniffing her butt.  She started screaming, "He's trying to kill me!" and the chubby little mini bear took off running, screeching like I really was killing her.

Percy:  Jan caught up to them and nearly laughed.  Bear was on her back with all four feet pumping like she was riding a bicycle, screeching like Marcus actually was killing her.  Marcus was standing over her trying to ... er, be polite.

Marcus:  Yes, I was being polite trying to sniff her butt but as I said she was RUDE!  Aside from her shrieking in my ears, she was kicking me on the nose with those pumping feet!

Merci:  Jan took Marcus back to his crate and gave him a treat to let him know he wasn't in trouble.   Then she turned to go check on Bear, just as Bear came sauntering through the doorway as if nothing had happened.  Yep, Bear definitely had attitude.  

Percy:  That Tuesday Bear's owner went home and so did Bear.

Marcus:  She wasn't a bad house guest, but she needs someone to explain the facts of canine etiquette - never kick a gentleman in the nose for saying hello!. 

Friday, June 08, 2018

Fractured Paw Award Returns

Taylor:  I'm feeling a bit upside down discombootalated.  Could you explain that again?

Merci:  I think you mean discombobulated, bit it makes perfect sense, if you think about it.

Percy:  Yes, We had Jan make this award for our blog back in 2014.  She didn't know we intended to present it to her.  The time has come to bring this award out of retirement.

Marcus:  And you're going to present it to her again?  Her birthday is coming up later this month.  Couldn't we give her flowers instead?

Cyndi:  We could if we had some cash.  This won't cost us anything.

Taylor:  I still don't understand why we would give her a klutz award.

Micah:  To reward her for all those exciting flights and crash landings she's become famous for, not to mention extra chuckles such as the underhanded ball playing that resulted in Jan's finger colliding with Marcus's teeth.

Rusty:  I agree she's is a good source for our humor material.  She does deserve recognition for creative accidents.

Taylor:  What did she do this time?

Micah:  Surely you heard her scream and saw her almost go headfirst down the porch steps Wednesday?

Taylor:  The neighborhood probably heard her,  But what caused that?

Marcus:  It was't me!  I had nothing to do with it!  I wasn't even outside at the time.

Rusty:  We know that, Marcus.  But I'm curious too.  What happened?

Cyndi:  I saw it from the window.  Jan grabbed the railing as she bopped down the steps.

Taylor:  So?

Merci:  So Jan didn't just grab the railing;  she grabbed a wasp on the railing and it stung her finger - twice!

Percy:  Evidently, not only was the pain worse than when she was stung in the arm last year while she was trimming bushes, but when the pain eased, the fingers on that hand itched so fiercely, she couldn't stop scratching for quite a while.

Rusty:  I must have been napping then.  I only knew about the angry wasp that went after her when she tried to let it outside and she whacked it head-on with the glass door.

Taylor:  I think we should present the award to the poor wasps instead of Jan.

Cyndi:  What? Why?

Taylor:  When the branch snapped last year, Jan accidentally hit one so hard with her arm she killed it, though not before it stung her.  For all we know the one on the railing was crushed, even though it managed to sting her twice.  And she cold-cocked another with a door.   Which do you think deserves the award the most - Jan, or the wasps?

This award was first presented to Jan in Fractured Paw Award.  And subsequently in Fractured Musings and two other posts. 

Tuesday, June 05, 2018

Strange Plumbing Problems

Micah:  Do you think anyone has missed us?

Rusty:  Everyone is so busy very few have probably noticed we've been gone.

Micah:  We're not exactly back yet, but we've had this post half ready to go for several weeks now.

Rusty:  We figure since we can always use a laugh, you might need one too.  Besides, we can never resist telling a story on Jan. 

Knock on door.

Stranger:  Is this (our house number)?
Jan:  Yes.

Stranger:  I understand you have plumbing problems.

(Note:  We did have a plumbing problem, but our landlord sent someone to fix it two days earlier while Mr. Doug was here working on our computer that Win 10 trashed by putting it into permanent hibernation.)

Jan:  Who told you that?

Stranger:  Tom Jones (not his real name).

Jan:  Who's he?

Stranger:  **points to a company van parked on our side street**  From the plumbing company.

Jan:  Who told him?

Stranger:  I don't know.

They stared at each other a few seconds.

Stranger:  I understand you have plumbing problems.

Jan:  Who told you that?

Stranger:  Tom Jones.

Jan:  Who is he?

Stranger:  The plumber.

Jan:  But who told him?

Stranger:  I don't know.

They stared at each other another few seconds.

Stranger:  I understand you have plumbing problems.

Jan:  Who told you ... Wait!  What STREET do you want? 

Stranger:  ** names our house number but side street**

Jan:  **points up the road**  You want that house over there.

Stranger almost ran to truck and the vehicle moved up the street.  Stranger sprinted up the steps.  We could just imagine what happened.

Stranger:  Is this (our house number)?

Tenant:  Yes.

Stranger:  I understand you have plumbing problems.

But this time he had the right house!

Friday, April 06, 2018

Butt Warmer Skillet

Merci:  Aha!  Jan finally caught you hanging out in her little iron skillet.  You are in trouble now!

Micah:  Oh, she's known about this for some time.  She just finally caught it with the camera.

Merci:  Why are you sitting there anyway?

Micah:  It keeps my butt warmer than just sitting on the stove top.

Merci:  But then Jan has to wash the skillet every time she wants to use it  Don't you feel the least bit guilty you're making her do extra work?

Micah:  No, it keeps her out of trouble.

Merci:  In that case, can you find me a step ladder and a slightly larger skillet?  I'm old.  I could use a butt warmer too.

Jan: It will be some time before the Mousebreath interviews can resume.  The only reason we are finally back online is thanks to the kindness and generosity of Mr. Doug. (Thank you!)  All our pictures, data, bookmarks, emails, addresses are on the old computer's hard drive so we don't have anything to work with.  Until Mr. Doug has time to see if he can work some magic, we won't know if they can be retrieved.    

Except for the Hipster Cats and Marg's Animals, we can't remember what cats were on the interview list.

Also, with this hand injury (Razor Sharp Teeth), I'm going to have to stop trying to type unless necessary.  It's just too painful and basically unreadable anyway.  I believe you can read this, bit it's taken a lot of extra time and retyping to make it readable. 

Please be patient with us.

We are joining the Pet Parade hosted by Rascal and Rocco and co-hosted by Bionic Basil and Barking from the Bayou.

Tuesday, April 03, 2018

Razor Sharp Teeth

Micah: Okay, Marcus, the other Funny Farmers are asking questions.  Start explaining to them. 

Marcus:  Explaining what?

Rusty:  Explaining why Jan is limping around on our new computer which she is far from finished setting up for our convenience.

Marcus:  Oh, that.  I was wondering the same thing myself.  She used to be a touch typist.  Now she can't find the keys and has to keep correcting, correcting, correcting.

Micah:  That's because she has only one and a fraction hands.

Marcus:  Either of you know what happened?

Rusty:  It just so happens I do.  I was taking a sun bath in the dog pen at the time.  You bit her, Marcus!

Marcus:  How can you say that?  I've never bitten anyone in my life!

Rusty:  I saw you do it.  Jan got tired of throwing your ball overhand because it spewed mud (dirt and saliva) on the house siding that she just washed and all over her, including in her face and hair.  She started throwing the ball underhand.

Micah:   Which brought the ball down to your level.  You always turn and run when Jan throws the ball, but this time -

Marcus:  Wait a minute.  You weren't even there!

Micah:  Rusty told me all about it and I also heard Jan talking on the phone..

Rusty:  You're so easily excited.  After a number of throws, you suddenly realized the ball was close enough to grab and instead of turning to run and catch it, you leaped forward.  You did catch the ball when Jan let it loose, but Jan's fingers were still attached and your jaws closed over them.  You scraped some fingers but your razor sharp teeth did a number on one. See?

Marcus:  I did that? Are you sure?

Rusty:  Yes. The dark red is blood.  The orange is iodine.  The injury happened Saturday.  This picture was taken yesterday, Easter Sunday..

Micah:  Why did you think Miss Pat asked Jan if she has forgiven you yet?

Marcus:  I thought is was because I tore the ball into little pieces when Jan suddenly stopped playing and disappeared.  I was bored.

Rusty:  The outside ball wasn't that important.  It was barely held together with duct tape because your teeth are so sharp. 

Marcus:  Jan didn't mention I was responsible for her hand injury,  Do you think she'll ever forgive me? 

Micah:  No!

Rusty:  Oh, stop crying, Marcus!  He was just kidding.  Jan knows it was a freak accident, so there's nothing to forgive.

Micah:  Why don't you go offer to finish setting up the computer so we can get back online? 

Marcus:  What a good idea!  I'll go do that now.

Rusty:  Are you nuts?  Marcus doesn't know the first thing about computers. 

Micah:  No, but Jan needs help typing.  Surely he can't bloody a keyboard!  Or can he?

Friday, March 30, 2018

Rusty, Dr. Seuss and March Lost

Have a blessed Easter Sunday.

Cyndi: Wow! We've been missing a whole month! We were working on posts for early March when Win 10 suddenly decided to change settings and put our computer into permanent hibernation, so we're just going to combine the posts here. We're not actually back yet but hope to be soon.

Micah:  March 1st was Rusty's 14th birthday.  He's still a handsome guy and we're sure happy he is still with us.

Cyndi:  Happy belated birthday wishes from all of us, Rusty.

Rusty:  Thank you.  But have you seen my cake?  I can't find it.

Micah:  I haven't seen your cake but Jan's in the kitchen.  You should ask her - .

Rusty:  Thanks.  I'll go check.

Micah:  - if she left you any.

I promised to fill Sam's hats,
But I don't have his whacky knack.
I miss all these guys, 
so hats I will try,
But, Sam, I'm a quack in your hat.

March 2nd was the day we celebrate the birthday of Dr. Seuss, the author of those zany books for children.  Sam always loved any day he could wear a hat and was well-known for wearing either the wrong hat for the occasion or the wrong size.  He is dearly missed, as are the other five Funny Farmers in the graphic that have passed away over our blogging years.  (Sam, Buddy, Jenny, Cotton, Crystal & Cameron.)  We remember them with a smile on this zany day.

Percy: Our Kitty Loaf interview was scheduled for Friday, March 2nd. That was all set to self-publish so it ended up as our only March post.  If you haven't read it yet, stop by Mousebreath to meet Kitty Loaf Cats Arya and Django.

Taylor:  A month is a long time, Percy.  Do you suppose anyone remembers us?

Percy:  Jan can't remember remember Diddly Squat any more but hopefully some of our readers have a better memory than she does..

We are joining the Pet Parade hosted by Rascal and Rocco and co-hosted by Bionic Basil and Barking from the Bayou.

Tuesday, February 27, 2018

Popping Corn iWith Drizzle

Cyndi: I haven't napped in two hours and yet I can't get to sleep, Marcus.  You're a guy with stories.  Tell me a bedtime one, please.

Marcus:  Okay.  It was a semi-dark and overcast, and drizzly morning yesterday.  Jan was fixing our breakfast when she heard the faint but clear sound of popcorn popping.  She checked the microwave, even pulled the plug.  It wasn't the toaster; the coffeepot wasn't dripping, neither was the tea kettle.  It had to be the gas stove.  You know about a gas stove, Cyndi.  If it was leaking, it could go KABOOM!

Cyndi:  *leaps into air*  I asked for a bedtime story, not a nightmare!

Marcus:  Jan moved everything including the metal burners from the old stove and lifted the top.  Wow, was it crumby in there!  She stopped investigating to do some cleanup.

Cyndi:  Is she crazy?  She stopped searching for the source to clean under the stove top?  What if the popping corn had exploded?

Marcus:  You know how easily Jan is distracted.

She started pulling things away from the wall.  She rolled away the plastic drawers and then the microwave cart.

Cyndi:  Let me guess.  She grabbed a broom and started sweeping back there!

Marcus:  No.  She looked behind the cabinet and stove.  The area was dry and there was no sign of popping corn.

Cyndi:  I know!  Mama mouse was in the wall popping corn while her little ones watched mini TV.

Marcus:  Stop interrupting me.  You know if there were mice, all of you cats would have been back there trying to punch a hole in the wall.

Jan glanced out the window..  Raindrops were bouncing off the igloo doghouse near the window in time to the popping corn.  Relieved, she moved everything back where it belonged.

Cyndi:  And then she finished fixing our breakfast?

Marcus:  Not yet.  Jan got to wondering why that igloo had been near the house for several years but it had never popped corn before.  It wasn't the igloo.  She went back to the window, leaned closer for a better view, and  -  You'll have to excuse me.  I need to go pee. Must be all this talk about rain.

Cyndi:  Marcus, come back here!  You haven't finished your story.

Marcus:  I'm sorry.  Jan forgot to come right back to let me inside.  Where was I?  Oh, yes, Jan leaned closer for a better view and saw the plastic storage bin she had been using to haul leaves to the curb upside down beside the igloo and the raindrops falling from the roof onto it did sound like popping corn.  The mystery was solved.

While Jan had been dawdling, Rusty had calmly munched half of Merci's kibble.  Jan refilled Merci's bowl and finally served us all breakfast.

There, now you can go to sleep.

Cyndi:  How?  I'm wide awake after your bedtime story..

Marcus:  Would you like me to tell you another one?

Cyndi:  Are you kidding!

Friday, February 23, 2018

Triple Blur Candy Cane

Marcus:  I don't know why Jan was complaining I act like a whirlwind.  Obviously I was being such a calm boy.

Micah:  Oh, excuse me.  I didn't mean to snort, but that took me by surprise.

Marcus:  The picture was taken after three weeks of being cooped up with no exercise while Jan had the flu.  That proves I'm a calm boy. 

Micah:  Then what does this picture prove?

Marcus:  That Jan is a bad photographer?

Micah:  This picture proves you wrong.  It was taken about ten seconds before the other one.  She offered you a stuffed candy cane.  You ripped it out of her hand and shook it so violently it's in the picture twice! Or is that three times?

Marcus:  Wow, I am good!  I bet you've never seen a triple blur candy cane before.

Micah:  I doubt anyone has.  You then rushed around into your crate to guard it from the rest of us.

Marcus:  Yes, I have to guard everything around here or one of you would steal it.

Micah;  But we didn't want it!

Marcus:  You could have told me that then.

Micah:  You didn't ask. 

Percy:  This week we Funny Farmer Felines interview Marv from the Marvelous is Marvelous blog.  Doesn't he have a sweet smile?

Cyndi:  You can read the story of his special rescue in Handsome Happy Marv on Mousebreath.

We are joining the Pet Parade hosted by Rascal and Rocco and co-hosted by Bionic Basil and Barking from the Bayou.

Tuesday, February 20, 2018

Imitating a Goofball

Marcus:  What a handsome dog that is.  He looks like he just won the Dog Treat Lottery.

Taylor:  Marcus, you aren't supposed to flatter yourself.  You're supposed to compliment others.

Marcus:  I am.  Oh, wait - you mean that's me?

Taylor:  Of course it is, you goofball.  Who else would it be?

Marcus:  I don't know, but I think I resemble Dr. Dreamy from Grey's Anatomy more than a goofball.

Taylor:  You wish.  Besides, he was killed off a while back.  You don't really want to imitate a corpse, do you?

Marcus:  No. I guess I'd rather imitate a goofball. 

Taylor:  Then you should be very proud of yourself.  You appear successful at it.

Friday, February 16, 2018

Merci Was Sleeping


Percy: Shhhhh!  Merci is sleeping.  You'll wake her up.

Marcus:  She should get up and come outside to play a rousing game of fetch with me. 

Percy:  She's old.  She needs her rest, not a rousing game of fetch.  One day you'll be old and want to sleep all the time too.

Marcus:  No, I'm never going to get old and sleepy.  If I do, who will keep Jan awake when she starts nodding off at 1 a.m.?

Percy:  I think the question would be more like, when you are old, who will awaken you at 1 a.m. so you can annoy the daylights out of Jan?

Marcus:  Don't worry.  I'll read the directions to learn how to reset Jan's alarm clock.

Percy:  And I suppose you'll borrow her glasses to read them?

Marcus:  But I have perfect vision.  Oh ... you mean when I supposedly get older.

Percy:  Yes, when you grow old, you will have to borrow Jan's reading glasses to see the dial and wear a hearing aid to hear the alarm.

Marcus:  Then I definitely don't want to grow old.

Percy:  You don't have a choice.  If you live long enough,  you will grow old.  By then you won't mind.  You'll have accepted it.   Merci did.  Where are you going?

Marcus:  To apologize to Merci for yelling when I entered the room.

Percy: But she's sleeping.  You'll wake her up!

Cyndi:  Spyder and Gracie are our interview subjects this week.  They don't have a blog yet but plan to.  You can read Presenting Spider and Gracie at Mousebreath.

We are joining the Pet Parade hosted by Rascal and Rocco and co-hosted by Bionic Basil and Barking from the Bayou.

Tuesday, February 13, 2018

Our Printer Finally Burped

Merci:  You should be napping.  Why are you still awake?


Cyndi:  I'm too excited about having a printer again. We've been without one since March 18 of last year when Win 10 did another upgrade and disconnected it. 

Merci:  Just as a short and hopefully comic version of why we furries have had a collective headache for the past 11 months...  Jan claims she has practically gone blind reading all the info for that printer, as well as all the MC how-to data on it.  Nothing worked!  It was there but it wasn't and it didn't do anything.

Cyndi:  That's when she found out she was not supposed to have a parallel cable plugged into a hub into a usb port on the computer.  But this computer has no parallel and only had two usb ports (until Doug recently added four more), hence the hub. The no-no setup worked just fine for about 3 years.

Merci: Must be the luck of the ignorant.  She didn't know better, so it worked for her.  She did say - repeatedly! - she didn't think the printer's usb port works.  Guess what?  It doesn't! 

Cyndi:  The printer company has been wanting her to call to resolve the problem, but she often has trouble remembering simple everyday words (and names of people she's known for 30 or 40 decades) and didn't want to go through that confusion on the phone with strangers.  (They can't see her waving her arms and turning red .)  To get a response to her emails, she had to sign up for an account and it was in that account she started finding some helpful postings.

Merci: It was not a problem with corrupted drivers, but multiple installs of them on different ports.  Also, there might be something left in the queue that didn't delete and wasn't showing.  She emailed the info to Mr. Doug Thursday night, ran CCleaner, and Mr. Doug showed up the next morning before she could install the printer for the gazillionth time to look for those problems.

Cyndi:  He brought the whole electronic pharmacy - laptop, new cable, etc.- and installed the printer on the laptop.  That's when we learned for sure that the printer usb doesn't work.  A test page was printed a few months ago, but when connected to a computer, the printer wouldn't even burp!


Merci:  So why is Cyndi excited about having a printer again?  Because it did print with the parallel cable plugged into a usb cable plugged into  a usb port.  Yep, the no-no set-up is the only one that works.

Cyndi:  Mr. Doug found two test files on here that had not deleted, the printer burped, and now we have a laser printer again.  Eleven months of perseverance, investigation, in/un-installations, confusion and discouragement shortened into one blog post.

Merci:  And Wednesday, two days prior, a very sweet lady gave Jan a brand new ink jet printer.  We haven't had a scanner since the old all-in-one died a few years ago.

Cyndi:  Jan was busy over the weekend printing some files before Win 10 decides to uninstall it again. 

Merci:  Of course, she might spend another 11 months trying to set up the all-in-one.

Cyndi:  Oh, dear, what if that's true? 

Merci:  Relax.  Marcus read all the instructions Jan used and he said if Jan has a problem with the new one, he'll install it himself.

Cyndi:  Marcus install our new printer?  Now I'll never be able to nap!

Merci:  Thank you for your help, Mr. Doug!  Jan said the next time you have a computer problem, it's her turn to come help you.

Cyndi:  You don't really think he'd take her up on that, do you?

Merci:  Not if he has any sense!

Friday, February 09, 2018

Photogenic Trio

Percy: Hey, I protest! You two keep hogging the posts with your photos. It's either you guys or Marcus.  The rest of us want equal time.

Micah:  It's not our fault Rusty and I are so photogenic and pose so nicely together.

Percy:  Well, I'm photogenic and I pose nicely.

Rusty:  Ah, but not "together" as we do.

Percy:  Micah and I don't like each other so I don't think you're going to get us to pose together.

Micah:  You should try it sometime.  It's really fun to have a friend.

Percy:  Okay, I'll just go sit on the other side of Rusty and Jan can take a picture of the three of us together.  Or sort of together.

Rusty:  Oh, no, you don't!  I'm not sitting between you two.  I don't have any claws to defend myself.

Micah:  I don't blame you.  Percy likes to attack for no reason.

Percy:  Attacking you is not for no reason.  I have to defend myself.

Micah:  Are you claiming I instigate our battles?

Percy:   Well, I certainly don't.  Or rarely do.

Rusty:  I think I hear some kibble calling my name in the kitchen.  Somehow I think I will feel safer in another room.  If you will excuse me, I'll just tiptoe out of range.

Micah:  That sounds like a good idea.  I think I'll have a snack too.  If you'll just move out of the house, Percy, so I can get by you...

Rusty:  Since Percy is otherwise occupied after being pushed off Marcus' crate by an unnamed assailant, I'll go ahead and announce our interview subjects for this week are from Cuddlywumps Cat Chronicles.

Stop by Mousebreath, the ezine for cats, to read Miss Cuddlywumps, Paisley and

We are joining the Pet Parade hosted by Rascal and Rocco and co-hosted by Bionic Basil and Barking from the Bayou.

Wednesday, February 07, 2018

Misplaced Jan and Memorial

Micah:  Cyndi, why are you wearing that old hat? I thought you had misplaced it.

Cyndi:  I found it and it's not old, at least not as old as Jan is.  She is the one who actually misplaced it behind some shelves in the bedroom.

Micah:  Are we going to have to misplace her soon and find a new human?

Cyndi:  I think so!  I can't believe what she did to us Sunday night.

Merci: It wasn't that bad.  We didn't catch her mistake either.

Micah:  But it's not the first time she's been on the wrong day, either forgetting or causing confusion.

Merci:  Calm down.  Take a deep breath and let's discuss this rationally.  It might help you feel better.

Cyndi:  Okay.  We felines have been working ahead on the mousebreath cat interviews.  Sunday night we finished another one and it's ready to auto publish in a couple of weeks.   By then it was very late and we were all tired.

Micah:  And suddenly Jan told us we didn't have a post for the next day and we'd better hurry up and post one before she turned off the computer.  We finished our yesterday's post after midnight, set it to auto publish, and gave a sigh of relief.  Then we went to bed.

Merci:  So what is the problem?   It all worked out well.

Cyndi:  The problem is that the next afternoon it occurred to us it was only Monday, not Tuesday.

Merci:  Yes, it was.

Micah:  But we have only been publishing on Tuesday and Friday now.

Merci:  Oh, I see.  Jan convinced you to write your Tuesday post Sunday night to publish on Monday.  Yes, that is a bit odd, even for her.

Cyndi:  We did publish on Tuesday - Jan's idea of Tuesday.  That's why we're publishing again today.

Merci:  Because it's Tuesday again?

Micah:  No, because it's Wednesday, the middle of the week.  Jan blew up our regular schedule and there's an extra day that needs attention.

Merci:  I'll take your word for it.  What an odd week.  Sunday became Monday.  Monday was Tuesday.  Tuesday was lost and Wednesday we are posting off schedule.

Cyndi:  Right.

Merci:  I hope readers aren't as confused as we are! They might not come back.

Micah:  Yes, it might be time to misplace Jan.

Jan:  On Facebook Monday (yes, it was actually Monday, not Sunday or Tuesday), I realized I hadn't seen a post from my old cat-loving friend KC.  She was not a blogger but we met through my blog and her cat story site.

I went to her page and read condolences.  I didn't know any of those people but  left a comment asking what happened.   KC had a heart attack Thanksgiving night.  It's hard to believe she is gone.

This is a picture of my ex-vehicle posted on JFF after a snowstorm in 2009. KC added her cats and some text to it and sent it back as a joke.  I loved it.  She was kind, funny, adored her cats and used to post to a site she called Gentle Annie2 named after her beloved cat Annie.

KC is now with her first husband and her son.  May her husband find strength and comfort in happy memories.  I am hopeful her cats are safe and comfortable.

KC sent this in 2008 and it seems appropriate to use it here.  We will remember you that have gone before, KC!  Rest in peace, dear friend.

Monday, February 05, 2018

Merci the Cat Magnet

Percy:  I think Merci has an admirer.

Marcus:  She does? 

Percy:  Yes, the other day when Jan was playing ball with you in the dog pen, there was a tuxie cat in the next yard watching.  We thought he (or she) was watching you.

Marcus:  Everyone watches me.  Jan says I'm not only good-looking, I'm fast and agile.

Percy:  No,  while you were huffing and puffing from the exercise, the tuxie suddenly jumped up and raced along the pen and stopped at the tree, where he stood for a while staring at Merci.

Marcus:  What was Merci doing to attract a cat?

Percy:  Nothing.  She was just doing her usual, walking up the steps to get inside and when the door didn't open, she would go back down and wander around in the corner. 

Marcus: I didn't see any cat.

Percy:  You were too engrossed in the ball.  And when Jan saw the tuxie stalking Merci, she used the ball to lure you in the house so you didn't scare the cat away.

Marcus:   Are you certain the cat was only interested in Merci?

Percy:  Positive!  Before Buddy, Sam and you came along, Merci was a cat magnet.  She rescued me when I was very young.  Cameron was so attached to her, he used to wait outside to follow Merci on her walks; then when he got tired, Jan would have to carry him home.  Finally, he just moved in.  And when it was just Merci and Jan, more than one cat used to follow them part way.

Marcus:  Wow!  I didn't know that.  Did Merci wear catnip perfune to attract them?

Percy:  No, silly.  They must have sensed her gentle nature.   I'm just amazed that tuxie was so interested in getting closer to Merci that he paid no attention to you.  You're hard to ignore!

Marcus:  I must be losing my magnetism.  I need to find it again.  What should I do?

Percy:  Oh, I don't know, but you could ask Merci for her secret.

Marcus:  I didn't know Merci has a secret. 

Percy:  That's because Merci is calm and doesn't babble all the time like someone we both know.

Marcus:  We know somene that babbles?  Who is it?  I won't tell.  Come on, Percy, you can tell me.  I'm your pal.  Is it Rusty?  No, it can't be.  It must be Cyndi.  She's a girl and girls like to chatter on and on about whatever.  No, wait, I know who it is.  I think.  Is it ...?

Percy:  Sigh!

Friday, February 02, 2018

Trusty Old Blue Ball

Micah:  You look pretty intense there, Marcus.  Is the ball threatening you?

Marcus:  No, it wouldn't dare threaten me.  Can't take my eyes off it for a second, though.

Micah:  Why, would it run away if you do?

Marcus:  I was waiting for Jan to try to kick it. She's sneaky, but I'm faster than she is sneaky.

Micah:  Oh, so you were playing soccer?

Marcus:  No.  She picked it up and threw it so we played chase.

Micah:  You don't play catch?

Marcus:  Rarely.  Jan usually throws it past me so it's hard to catch.  But I am good at catching if she bounces it.

Micah:  I'm all for anything that exercises you and tires you out so you leave the rest of us alone for a few minutes.

Marcus:  Jan might have returned my red ball to Amazon (Sending Red Ball on Vacation) but I still have my trusty old blue ball with the tooth holes in it.  Oh, and by the way, the rope toy Jan accidentally threw into the tree a few months ago finally fell down into the pen.  So if this ball should happen to fall apart for no reason, I'll still have something to chase.

Micah:  So your new blue ball is now your trusty old blue ball.  Interesting.  But you do know, I hope, if this ball should happen to fall apart, it will certainly NOT be for no reason!

Marcus:  You're right.  If this ball falls apart, it will be Jan's fault.  She's awfully hard on my toys!

Percy:  Our interview this week is with Sophie, Dexter and Olive.  You can read Three Chatty Cats Chat on Mousebreath. 

We are joining the Pet Parade blog hop with hosts, Rascal and Rocco, and co-hosts  Bionic Basil, and Barking from the Bayou.

Tuesday, January 30, 2018

Sending Red Ball on Vacation

Cyndi:  What are you grumbling about, Marcus?

Marcus:  My ball.  My new red ball.  Or it was my new red ball when it arrived.  Jan took it outside to play catch with me right after it arrived and stopped after a couple of tosses.  I wasn't done playing!

Cyndi:  You're never done playing!

Marcus: I need my exercise!  She did say I could play with it by myself in the house but within two minutes she had taken it away and hasn't let me play with it since.  It's MY ball!

Cyndi:  And your teeth.  The ball was supposed to be hard but not rock solid hard.  That thing is so heavy and hard it could break your teeth and then what would you do about eating.  *holds up paw*  Never mind.  You'd just gum your food to death.

Marcus: It wasn't breaking my teeth when she took it away.

Cyndi:  Maybe not, but you were chewing up the ball and about to eat the pieces.  Rubber isn't good for you, even though you do have a cast iron stomach.

Marcus:  Most of it is still intact.

Cyndi:  It was supposed to be "virtually indestructible".  "Most of it is still intact" doesn't count.

Marcus:   It isn't fair.  It's my ball and instead of letting me play with it, she's sending it on a vacation.

Cyndi:  She's returning it to Amazon, just as soon as she figures out how she can get a label printed and get the ball in the mail. by Wednesday.  She didn't realize she can get back her money until she wrote a review of the prodict on Amazon.  The return time is almost up.

Marcus:  I'd rather have the ball.

Cyndi:  I think you can convince Jan to trade the ball for a treat.  Why don't you ask?

Marcus:  A peanut butter biscuit?

Cyndi:  Yes, there are still some peanut butter biscuits left.

Marcus:  Okay.  I'll go ask but if she wants to send my ball on vacation, I think I deserve a lot more than one!

This is the ball purchased that will hopefully be returned.  We were very disappointed with it!  (Well, Jan was, Marcus wasn't.)

Friday, January 26, 2018

The Interviews Return

Cyndi:  Why are we reposting this old photo of me taking a bath in the bureau and you doing your I'm-innocent-innocent-I-tell-you dance.

Marcus:  Well, I was innocent.  Jan pulled out the drawer herself in the middle of the night when she caught the drawer handle with something.

Cyndi:  True.  One of those rare times you actually were innocent.  But why are we posting the picture?

Marcus:  We are trying to get back to blogging on Tuesday and Friday.  Today is Friday and we don't have a single idea of what to post.

Cyndi:  How about the good news we announced on Tuesday?

Marcus:  We had good news on Tuesday?

Cyndi:  Yes.  Weren't you paying attention?

Marcus:  Probably not.  You cats can ramble on forever sometimes.

Cyndi:  Percy, can you remind us of the good news and make it short and sweet?

Percy:  I sure can.  We are finally able to resume interviews, starting with the Cat's Eye Boyz.  You can read The Cat's Eye Boyz Tell All .on Mousebreath. 

We are joining the Pet Parade blog hop with hosts, Rascal and Rocco, Bionic Basil, and Barking from the Bayou.

Tuesday, January 23, 2018

Flying Feline Ego

Merci:  Oh, no, I see the Funny Farmer Felines are returning.  Guess they'll be running around here again with swelled heads.

Marcus:  Yeah, there was a lot of flying feline ego around when they were posting Mousebreath interviews.

Rusty:  Come on, guys, you know that isn't true.  You're just jealous because Mousebreath is only for cats; no dogs allowed.

Micah:  It wasn't our idea.  We would let you join us if we could.

Taylor:  Yes, we like you guys.  Most of the time.  Marcus is a little rowdy at times, but as a general rule, he's okay.

Cyndi:  The interviews will resume Friday, but we need some volunteers who would like to tell their stories.  There is no way we can find all the Cat Scouts, social media cats, blogging cats, etc. on our own.

Percy:  We apologize for the long break between interviews but Jan just kept ruining our plans and we had to keep our nursing skills honed for her.  You wanted the Mousebreath interviews to return, so step up and help us locate new interviewees. 

Merci:  Well, so this post isn't a total loss for we canines, Marcus has a joke for you.

Marcus:  A guy was admitted to the hospital with eight plastic horses in his stomach. His condition is now stable.

Merci:  You consider that a joke?  Next time you better run it by me first.

Marcus:  You didn't catch it when it  just walked by; what makes you think you could catch it if it runs by you?

Monday, January 15, 2018

Visit Your Rainbow Friends

Hey, Cyndi here.  No, we're not back yet, but I wanted to talk to all of you for a moment.  First, though, Jan has not been idle.  One can evidently only stand accomplishing nothing for so long.  She is returning to the land of the busy with lots of sit down breaks in between.  Marcus has been waiting for his next walk since Dec 21st when Jan took sick.  At least he is now getting exercise chasing a ball in the dog pen. 

Aside from laundry, cleaning and other boring house jobs that are way behind, Jan has just finished the last 9 - yes 9! - months of the 2015 blog posts that lost their photos when Picasa switched to GPhotos.  That was a project she never wants to do again! It was complicated and time consuming but at least the last nine were "easier" than the first three once she learned how to not lose her place every time a post republished.

But what I want to talk to you about is the Our Rainbow Friends memorial blog.  Ann, the Zoolatry human, generally sends out a mass email on the 15th of each month, or sometimes just posts on Facebook because of the hassles that can come with a mass mailing.  For whatever reason, we haven't received or seen a notice since the September memorials came out in October.  And as you know, Ann is presently on vacation, so not doing any notifications.

Amber da Weenie's mom Linda is the lone, hard worker behind the scenes for that blog.  She knows it means a lot to one who has lost a cat, dog, bird or other loved pet to have a memorial bridge post.

We were thinking it would be great if current bloggers would participate in helping Linda keep up with the losses.  (If you don't already have the badge, grab the one above.)  If you are a blogger who just lost a furry or know of a blog that just lost one, let Ann or Linda know.  When the previous month's memorials are posted on the 15th, share the information with friends and readers, then visit and comment (even for those you don't know).  It doesn't take long to say you care about someone's loss.  There are those such as Golden Pines and White Dog Army that take in older dogs and have more than normal losses, but each one is loved and missed.  A virtual hug would be welcomed.

We have long depended on Ann to keep everyone informed and not everyone realizes the hassles she has frequently gone through with gmail.  Linda deserves a medal for her dedication to this project, despite an outside job, intermittent internet, a home and her canine pack to care for.

So, as busy as we know you are, we're suggesting we all step up to help publicize each month's memorial posts, as well as visit.  Those are our rainbow friends - yours and mine.  Those are our blogging friends, old and new.  Let's show our support! 

The December losses have been posted at Our Rainbow Friends.

We hope to learn some new jokes while we're on hiatus, so stay tuned.  And we still have a few more interviews to finish.

Sunday, January 07, 2018

Be Back When We Can

Rusty:  Hey, do you remember us?  We've been missing for what feels like forever.

Micah:  We stopped by to let you know we're going to be missing for a good bit longer. 

Rusty:  It's all Jan's fault!  She is under strict order to never, never, never, never, never, never, never, never, NEVER visit anyone and sit under a rotating fan again!!!!!!  Especially in the winter.  But she should never sit in a draft at any time- period! 

Micah:  Aside from getting a bad respiratory illness, her pain level went through the roof and she almost couldn't move her arms or turn her head for two weeks.  Trying to sleep in a chair and take care of us, even minimally, wore her out. And poor Marcus.  Loud, rambunctious, energetic Marcus had zero exercise for two full weeks.  We cats were ready to lock him in the closet and hide the key.  He is getting a few minutes of ball chasing outside the last few days

Rusty:  Mr. Doug kindly brought her things to help her get better, but we also need to thank Jan's friends Johnnie and her husband James for bringing her some food now that Jan is trying to eat again.  And Miss Suzanne, thank you so much for the Christmas smoked turkey that Jan couldn't open until New Years. 

Micah:  It's freezing here and we're all hunkered down trying to get through this horrible weather, which is worse in other parts of the country.  The house is drafty and the floor is frozen.  If you enjoy camping in the winter, come visit us, you'll feel right at home.

Rusty:  Jan has been sick since Dec 21st.  We tried to get our Christmas e-card to everyone on our list and to respond to everyone who sent us either a snail card or an e-card, but we know we missed some.  Please accept our heartfelt apologies.  No oversight was intended.

Micah:  Jan has been trying to check facebook occasionally for those that are sick or have lost a furry, but we're really out of the loop, so feel free to email us to let us know of any such news.   We will be back, but we have no idea when. 

Rusty:  Meanwhile, keep smiling so no one knows what you are plotting.