Friday, October 30, 2015

Halloween Bleeding Pumpkin FFHT

MERCI:  Have you ever heard the Halloween story of the bleeding pumpkin?

MARCUS:  No, Is it a good one?

CYNDI:  Oh, you better believe it's good.

RUSTY:  You know that Jan doesn't do Halloween decorating.  Have you ever wondered why?

MARCUS:  Yes, I have.  But I figured we can't afford to decorate.

SAM:  Actually, before your time, Jan got a big pumpkin to carve for Halloween.  She figured if other people can carve one, she could too.

MICAH:  So we all sat down to watch a spooky Halloween show on the TV while Jan sat at the desk with a large knife and carved a face on the pumpkin.

BUDDY:  Just before the last commercial, there was a frightening scream behind us.  We all turned and there was the pumpkin with wide eyes and big teeth.  Blood was gushing out it's mouth and dripping from its eyes.

PERCY:  I ran over and Jan's hand with the knife was inside the pumpkin/  Blood was spurting out of her wrist and through the pumpkin's eyes and mouth.

MARCUS:  Jan cut herself with the knife?

CYNDI:  That's what we thought too, but Jan was screaming that the pumpkin bit her.

MARCUS:  Bit her?  But pumpkins don't bite.  Er ... do they?

MERCI:  That one must.  I dialed 9-1-1 with my nose for an ambulance.   An E.M.T. said he could see what appeared to be large tooth marks in her wrist. 

RUSTY:  Jan was taken away to the Emergency Room to stop the bleeding.  After a while, two police officers came and read the pumpkin its rights.

SAM:  They carried it outside, put it in the back seat of a squad car, and drove away.  We never saw it again.

MARCUS:  What about Jan?

MICAH:  Oh, yes, we saw Jan again. 

BUDDY:   It was a traumatic night.   After that I never turned my back on another pumpkin. And we have never decorated for Halloween again.

It is Fractured Fryday Hairy Tails day over at Murphy and Stanley's blog.

PERCY:  Our latest cat interview of Finnegan  and his siblings, Daily Wisdom of 7 Cats and Counting, has published at Mousebreath, the ezine for cats.

Join the Pet Parade blog hop hosted by Rascal and Roscoe.  It is co-hosted by Bionic Basil, Barking From the Bayou and Love is being owned by a husky.

Thursday, October 29, 2015

Ollie Goldendoodle and 'Tocks

MARCUS:  Jan and I passed a goldendoodle and his human last week on one of our evening walks. I wanted to go see him but Jan said I have to learn to behave first.  She's kidding, isn't she?  I always behave!

BUDDY:  In your dreams, Marcus. You came home, Jan grabbed her little walking camera and ran out the door without any of us dogs to protect her.

SAM:  Guess she didn't need any protection that time. As they walked by on the other side of the street, Jan asked if she could take a picture for us to post on our blog.  They both said yes.

MERCI:  Here are Ben the human and Ollie the Goldendoodle. Jan said Ollie is so handsome.  And friendly.  He wasn't pushy, wanting all the attention for himself, as one of us is wont to do. 

CYNDI:  He is evidently trained and well-behaved.  Ben would like Ollie to be a therapy dog because he loves people and is so calm, even at eight months of age.  

RUSTY:  Unlike a certain big-eared brown dog we know that is so hyper and constantly talking in a high-pitched screech.  Yes, I am talking about you, Marcus. 

MICAH:  October will be ending in a couple of days and we have nearly missed Angel Derby's "Tocktober-fest".  His brother Ducky carries on the tradition in honor of Angel Derby's October birthday.

PERCY:  Here are our 'tocks.  Puppy Marcus and Sam represent the canines and I represent us felines.  Please take note of which one of us is exhibiting some modesty. 

SAM:  We have a winner in our Petsafe Breakaway Collar Giveaway.  We numbered all the entries and used to pick a number. 

BUDDY:  Our winner is Dennis the Vizsla and as soon as we receive his shipping information, we will start the ball rolling so that he - or one of his siblings - can travel to new adventures with a safety collar.  Click here for collar color choices and size chart.

Today is Thursday -

Pepi Smart Dog is hosting the Thankful Thursday blog hop.  (There is always something to be thankful for!)

And don't forget Ruckus the Eskie, Love is being owned by a husky, and Barking from the bayou for the Thoughtless Thursday blog hop.  

Monday, October 26, 2015

Rawhide Crunching

BUDDY:   For me?

MERCI:  Are you sure that's for me?

Jan:  I'm offering them  each a piece of U.S. Hide.  They are very thin natural strips of rawhide.  Made from 100% USA beef hides.  No bleach or formaldehyde.  Merci, Buddy and Sam have not had rawhide in a number of years.  Marcus has never had any.

MARCUS: I didn't have to think about it.  I grabbed my piece. 

SAM:  What a handsome guy!  Oh, that's me! 

BUDDY:  I'm not ready to chew on mine yet, but I'm standing guard in case anyone tries to steal it.

RUSTY:  I'll say you are!  I tried to go by you to the bedroom and you let out a roar so loud my ears are still ringing.  Needless to say, I changed my mind. 

BUDDY:  Here I am enjoying a piece while Sam exercises his teeth on one.

SAM:  Notice Buddy didn't say he is enjoying his piece.  He's been playing musical rawhide with us.  I'm glad he finally decided on which piece he wants so the rest of us can have one.

MARCUS:  I think I'll stop playing ball long enough to eat mine.

MERCI:  Does anyone want seconds?  I guess Jan forgot I'm an old lady with my own teeth but my teeth are as old as I am.

BUDDY:  I ate most of mine and Sam finished it.  I used to love rawhide but my teeth and I have aged too.

MARCUS:  Since Sam got half of Buddy's, I have dibs on yours, Merci.

SAM:  Well, I think they're great.  Marcus and I have been sharing the remainder of the rawhide.

MARCUS:  Sam is much bigger than I am so he finishes his first and then drools over mine.

SAM:  I guess that means two out of four paws up for the U. S. Hide rawhide chips.  Guess the old fogies like treats they don't have to chew, just crunch and swallow.

MERCI:  Watch what you say about us.  You're getting up there in age too. provided us with the chews for this review.  We were not paid nor were we influenced in what to say.  Any opinions are strictly our own.

Oh, and today is the last day to enter our giveaway.  It ends at 11:30 tonight.  If you haven't already read Friday's post on the Petsafe Breakaway Collar for dogs, we are giving one away.  One of these safety collars could save your dog's life! But to win you must leave a comment on the post Petsafe Breakaway Collar Giveaway.  Details in that post.

Saturday, October 24, 2015

Bionic Basil Interviews Funny Farmers

MARCUS:  Which way did they all go? I went outside to take a pee and when I came back inside everyone was gone. Hey, guys, where are you?  Come on, this isn't funny.

RUSTY:  Pssst, Marcus, over here.

MARCUS:  Over where?  I don't see you.

SAM:  Didn't you get the memo?

MARCUS:  What memo?

MERCI:  We're supposed to be visiting today, remember?

MARCUS:  No, I didn't get a memo and I don't remember anything about visiting because this is the first I've heard of it.

MICAH:  You should attend more staff meetings, Marcus.

MARCUS:  What staff meetings?  Jan doesn't have any staff!

CYNDI:  No, silly.  We are the staff of Jan's Funny Farm blog.

MARCUS:  Oh, right.  But every time I come to a meeting, you just send me in the kitchen to collect water bowls.

PERCY:  Surely you remember our invitation to sit down with Bionic Basic and his siblings recently?  They turned the tables on us and this time we are the subject of an interview.

MARCUS:  Oh, right.  I remember that.  But where are you?  I hear you talking but I don't see a one of you.

BUDDY;  We're over at Bionic Basil's blog.  He published our interview today. You need to get over here right away!  These guys serve the best refreshments!

MARCUS:  Okay, where's "here"?

SAM:  Click your heels together while holding one paw on your nose so you don't sneeze and say the magic words, Abrazippity -

MARCUS:  Stop messing with me, Sam!  Hey, I should yell at Sam more often.  I'm here.

CYNDI:  And you readers should be here too.  Come read our interview at Bionic Basil's blog.

RUSTY:  Oh, and if you haven't already read yesterday's post on the Petsafe Breakaway Collar for dogs, we are giving one away.  One of these safety collars could save your dog's life! But to win you must leave a comment on the post Petsafe Breakaway Collar Giveaway.  Details in that post.

Friday, October 23, 2015

Petsafe Breakaway Collar Giveaway

RUSTY:  What was Jan thinking when she took this picture?

MICAH:  I believe she was trying to take a picture of the dogs in their new collars.

CYNDI:  But how do you explain the fact the dogs are barely in the photo? 

PERCY:  Oh, that's easy.  Jan ... uh ... she ... I have no idea!

MERCI:  Whatever it was, I believe she missed.  But at least she caught my pretty new purple collar.  You guys are out of luck! And just about out of the picture.

MICAH:  Petsafe has launched Collar Safety Awareness Week (October 18-24)  to coincide with National Animal Safety and Protection Month.  

RUSTY:  We thought we would assist our canine siblings as they help Petsafe educate the public about the risks of strangulation and dangers of traditional collars.

PERCY:  These are the new PetSafe® KeepSafe® Break-Away Collars for the dogs.  At least Jan managed to get them in a picture. 

UPDATE:  Our friend Bailey left a question that we didn't answer adequately..  "I get the dangers of catching, my only concern is them breaking and creating an unsafe situation where the dog shouldn't be free."  Thanks for bringing this up, Bailey.

Here is a much better explanation, quoted directly from Petsafe's website:   Designed to prevent dogs from getting entangled by their collars, the KeepSafe® Break-Away Collar has a patented break-away safety buckle that releases when pressure is applied. If your dog's collar gets stuck on something and starts to choke, the buckle releases and the collar falls off harmlessly. Most collar accidents happen when multiple dogs are playing at home, at the dog park, or in doggie daycare or when the collar gets stuck on a fence, deck, crate, kennel, vent, bush, or tree.  

There is no danger of it breaking away when a leash is attached because you attach the leash to TWO metal rings, one on either side of the breakaway.  

CYNDI:  Each collar has two rings.  Jan attaches a leash to both of them to keep the collar from breaking away on a walk. But at any other time, if the collar is twisted, the collar will break apart so the dog is not choked.  This could save a life!

SAM:  Thanks for your help, guys, but we can take it from here.  These collars (mine is black) are designed for safety and are quite comfortable.  Jan had no trouble adjusting them to fit us.  

BUDDY:  The collar was invented by Tenney Mudge after the devastating loss of her beloved dog, Chinook, to a collar strangulation accident.

MERCI:  There are two videos on YouTube that can tell you more about why these collars are safer for your dog. 

BUDDY:  As usual, Marcus is oblivious to everything when he is outside, except playing with his ball, but he is wearing his new red collar.  Rusty is keeping an eye on him.

SAM:  All Sam ever wants to do is to play.  But I want to be serious for a minute.  We want to share a blogging story some of you might recognize.

MERCI:  Several years ago, there was a blogging dog named Deetz.  His family adopted a little brother for him.  I think his name was Sharkie.  (If it wasn't it is for this post.)  They got along well and were always playing together.

BUDDY:  One morning their dad was getting ready for work.  The dogs were playing outside in the pen when their dad heard terrifying screams.  He raced outside but it was already too late.

SAM:  The dogs' collars had become entangled and Sharkie was dead.  Strangled. Sharkie's family was devestated.   Deetz no longer blogs but we have never forgotten this tragedy.

MERCI:  So in memory of Sharkie and Deetz, we are pleased to be able to to give away one canine PetSafe® KeepSafe® Break-Away Collar in the winner's choice of color and size.  

SAM:  All you have to do to enter is to leave a comment on this blog post between now and Monday, October 26, 11:59 PM. We apologize, but we need to limit the giveaway to those in the US.

BUDDY:  Make certain there is some way to contact you should you win - a blog url or email address.  If we can not contact you within three days, we will have to choose an alternate winner. 

Petsafe provided us with sample collars, but we were not paid for this review.  All opinions expressed are our own.

Thursday, October 22, 2015

Hugs From Around The World Day

MICAH:  Today is a special day.  It's Hugs From Around the World Day.

MARCUS:  Does that mean if I ask you for a hug, you'll hug me, Sam? 

SAM:  No way!  Cookies, Marcus, cookies!

CYNDI:  I think you mean "cooties", Sam.  

MERCI:  I thought cooties was a fictional disease that ...

SAM:  *elbows Merci in ribs*  Marcus doesn't know that. 

MARCUS:  So then what is Hugs from Around the World Day?

MERCI:  Hailey and Zaphod came up with the idea and Dory and her mom from Dory's Back Yard  made the graphic. Today is the big day!

(If you want to celebrate the day but aren't sure what to do, the directions are at Hailey and Zaphod Chronicles.)

CYNDI:  As you know our friends Stella Rose, Margaret Mae, and Angus McConnell from The Three Little Pugs have been kind of lonely lately.  Their dad was injured at work and broke his back in three places.

BUDDY:  Their mom hasn't been home very much since then but their dad is now in a hospital closer to home and hopefully will be home soon.

MARCUS:  So the pugs are brushing up on their nursing skills?

RUSTY:  I imagine so!  Their dad is going to need lots of love and special care that only a furry can give.  And their mom will need some too.

PERCY:  This day is for Blogville to tell Deb and Butch how much they are loved and appreciated and that we are all there for them.  In essence, Blogville is sending them one gigantic warm hug today!

MARCUS:  Oh, that's so nice.  Can I send a hug to someone else?

BUDDY:  I suppose so.  Who do you have in mind?

MARCUS:  Amber's mom, her family, and their canine pack.  They've been going through a lot, too, and we want them to know we care.

PERCY:  That's a good idea, Marcus.  And there are some other bloggers we know who have been / are going through rough times whose names we won't mention, but we sure do want to send them a big, warm hug too!  And anyone else in need of one today!

MARCUS:  Does this mean I can have a hug now, Sam?

SAM:  Back away.  Cookies, Marcus, cookies!

Enter the Hugs From Around the World blog hop at Oz the Terrier's.

Also, Pepi Smart Dog is hosting the Thankful Thursday blog hop.  (There is always something to be thankful for!)

And don't forget Ruckus the Eskie, Love is being owned by a husky, and Barking from the bayou for the Thoughtless Thursday blog hop. 

Wednesday, October 21, 2015

Who Wants To Play Ball

MARCUS:  Who wants to play ball?

SAM:  Is that a knock knock joke?

MARCUS:  No, it's not a joke.  Who wants to play canine soccer?

PERCY:  I don't know why you bother to ask.  The answer is that you do!

Sunday, October 18, 2015

A Cat Being A Cat

MICAH:  We have a good laugh for you today.  Two Sunday Smiles, actually.

MERCI:  They aren't related but they go so well together, like two sides of a door.

RUSTY:  Heehee, Merci.  Two sides of a door. That's a good one because that's exactly what they are.

MARCUS:  Except these are "opposite" sides of two doors.  How can that be, you ask?

CYNDI:  When you have cats being cats, you have to expect the unexpected.  Did I say that correctly?

BUDDY:  Yes, Cyndi.  I have lived with you and other cats cats since I was 2 or 3 weeks old and I can speak from experience you will always do the unexpected!

PERCY:  These are both very short.  This is what happened after someone installed a cat door and the cat used it for the first time.  Here is Part 1.

If the video doesn't play, click here.

SAM:  And here is the view from the other side of the door.  Even though it isn't the same door, it's ... Well, it's Part 2 of a cat being a cat.

If the video doesn't play, click here

Jan:  Now that you've had a couple of laughs, I want to get serious.  If you own a dog, please LEASH him.  If you live in this area and you don't think the leash law pertains to you, you are a pompous moron. My dogs have been the objects of more attacks than I can count and I have had more injuries than I want to remember since I adopted Merci in 2003 and three dogs attacked her two months later.  A neighbor once gave me a golf club for protection from a very persistent and aggressive territorial doxie but the heft was wrong and wasn't any protection. 

Last night when Marcus and I topped the parking lot hill and headed for the sidewalk, three - not one but THREE!! - dogs came racing at us, barking and growling.  All I had for protection was an almost empty water pistol.  Marcus and I stood still until the first one, a doxie, crossed the street and came within a foot or so of us.  It turned back when I squirted it.  The two across the street stopped just long enough for the biggest dog (a hound mix about Marcus's size) to tear up some turf with his back paws to mark his territory (with the scent glands on his paws), and then all three came charging across the road.  If we had been on their side of the road, they would have torn into Marcus before that doxie had reached us the first time. And because of his breed, Marcus would have been blamed as the one who started it.  At the last moment,  the asinine S.O.B. who owns the dogs called them home.  I never saw him, only heard his voice, so I don't know if he was in the house while his dogs ran loose, or if he was sitting on his front porch watching and waited till I yelled at the dogs to go home.

The last time a dog came after us (2 or 3 weeks ago), Marcus nearly killed me yanking me around so hard trying to protect us that I was bent double with chest pain, struggling to breathe.  I had to resort to trying to kick Marcus's legs out from under him to get his attention.  Once I had his attention, he alternated between checking on me and looking back to check on the dog, and we somehow made it home with the other dog following most of the way, but with no further incident.  

Marcus, the dog who has been attacked without provocation so many times on our walks, was such a brave dog last night.  He stood quietly beside me.  He never so much as barked when those dogs came at us.  I was so proud of him!  Terrified but proud.

Carrying pepper spray doesn't work.  I learned the hard way it clogs and doesn't work when needed.  I read somewhere an air horn will scare off dogs, but someone gave me one and ... no way will I carry it!  I am, however, wondering how I can get my hands on the liquid from a jar of some VERY hot chili peppers to put in my water pistol.  

Anyone have any suggestions on how to protect myself and my dogs without having to carry around a sledge hammer?

Saturday, October 17, 2015

Making An Impression

MARCUS:  I'm becoming popular.  And famous.

CYNDI:  Since when?

MARCUS:  I have a face and ears everyone can love.

RUSTY:  I doubt that.

MARCUS:  Well, on our way home Thursday, a young woman passed us, then stopped to tell Jan, "You have my dog."

SAM:  So what are you doing here?  Jan should have returned you on the spot!  It would have made us all so happy ... I mean, sad.

MARCUS:  But I didn't know the young lady.  She evidently has a dog that looks just like me. Except he's white and his name is Jody. He has this handsome face with big pointy ears.  Big pointy ears are sexy to the ladies, you know.  Like Mr. Spock from Star Trek.

MERCI:  I don't know about that.  I'm a lady and I don't find your ears sexy.  Just tall.

Caturday Art with Athena.

MICAH:  So, if Jan stopped to chat with her, did you show off with another strip tease?  (Marcus Houdini)

MARCUS:  No, I was a perfect angel.  I lay down quietly.  I stood up on my back feet to show her how tall I am, I let her pet me and feed me a treat, and then I impressed the daylights out of her!

PERCY:  *face palm with paw*  Oh, no, what did you do, Marcus?

MARCUS:  There was a fly flitting by, so I leaped, snapped and swallowed.  Just like you taught me to do, Buddy, only I don't miss.  You should have seen the young lady's eyes grow big.  She was impressed.

BUDDY:  I doubt "impressed" is the correct word.  But it sounds as if you did make an impression.

Sepia Saturday with Ruckus the Eskie.

 Be sure to go by and join the blog hops Caturday Art and Sepia Saturday.

 Caturday Art is hosted by Athena.

Sepia Saturday is hosted by Ruckus the Eskie & Earl's World.

Friday, October 16, 2015

A Giggle of Geese

RUSTY:  The dogs have been hogging the blog for a few days, so we're taking it over for today.

MICAH:  This should be our first Mousebreath interview post under the new, supposedly easier, less work, and faster turnaround format.  However -

CYNDI:  Yes, however, we only had one response and he hasn't returned the questions with answers yet.

PERCY:  But under the new relaxed format, we aren't going to worry about it.  Less work for us if no one wants to be interviewed.

CYNDI:  Not that we don't want anyone to apply.  We just aren't going to stress about it.  Cool cats, that's us!

MICAH:  However - there's that word again - we have a fun post for you today.  We have -

PERCY:  Hey, what's Marcus doing here?  None of the dogs were invited.  Deliberately not invited.

MARCUS:  But I have a story from yesterday's walk with Jan that I just have to tell.

RUSTY: Your story from yesterday's walk is being written for Saturday's post.  That's tomorrow.

MARCUS:  But this story isn't about me.  It's about Jan.  She lost some marbles.

PERCY:  Jan lost more marbles? 

MARCUS:  A couple of guys think so.  We lost a whole giggle of geese by the mill yesterday.

CYNDI:  How did you lose a whole -?  Did you say a giggle of geese?  Do you mean a gaggle of geese?  That applies only if they were not in flight.

PERCY:  It doesn't matter what Marcus calls them - giggle, gaggle, flock - or whether or not they were in flight.  We don't have any geese to lose.

MARCUS:  When we were doing a second lap near where we sometimes see geese, we heard a whole flock of giggles ... I mean, geese honking behind us.  We turned around and there were a lot of them flying in formation .  Jan wished there was time to get the camera out to video them but they flew overhead so fast there was no time.  They circled around and come in for a landing.  As they came down, they flew right over our heads, honking away.

MICAH:  That's it?  What does that have to do with Jan's marbles?

MARCUS:  You didn't wait for me to finish.  We watched them through the tree branches as they flew low overhead.  And then they just disappeared.  We turned around to see where they'd landed and no honking, no geese.  They all just disappeared.  Jan was so shocked she walked over to the fence and walked up and down looking for some sign of the birds.  The two guys working inside the fence kept watching us.  I tried to tell them Jan was looking for geese, but they had this "she's lost her marbles?" look.  I walk Jan every day so I recognize that look.  I know they weren't close but I have excellent distance vision.  Poor Jan.  She never did find the geese.  Or any marbles.  It's a mystery how so many big birds could disappear into thin air.

PERCY:  So you have excellent eyesight and hearing but you don't know where the birds went either?

MARCUS:  Of course not!  I can't see over the back of my head!  My ears are in the way.

Join the Pet Parade blog hop hosted by Rascal and Roscoe.  It is co-hosted by Bionic Basil, Barking From the Bayou and Love is being owned by a husky.

Thursday, October 15, 2015

My Better Side

CYNDI:  The dogs usually come home complaining about a boring walk.

RUSTY:  Do they go on the same walk as Jan? 

MICAH:  Just keeping her in line has to be a full-time job.

PERCY:  We hear she is always stopping and trying to wander off.

SAM:  We have very little excitement on our walks.  Tuesday morning we saw this as we passed the place where Jan took the photos of Marcus Houdini last Friday.  Someone tied a sack of fast food trash to a tree on mill property.

MARCUS:  It was gone when we walked by a few hours later.

BUDDY:  On Wednesday morning's walk, we met a short tan and white dog we didn't recognize.  He was trotting down the sidewalk as if he had an important appointment.

MERCI:  He was quite friendly.  We all introduced ourselves and visited for a while and then he trotted off.

SAM:  He was wearing a collar and a tag so Jan wanted to leash him so she could locate his owner.  But she couldn't since she had her hands full with us.  All she could do was watch him trot away and head up the hill toward Ingle's grocery. We hope his owner found him and he wasn't picked up by Animal Control.

MARCUS:  Then, when I walked Jan in the evening, she was unhappy to find this in the same area the trash bag was tied to the tree on Tuesday.  Deep ruts torn around the lawn. 

MARCUS:  Hey, here I am, down here.  Jan promised if I kept my big head out of the photos, she would take some pictures of me.  Big head?  Well, look at her little pinhead in her shadow. 

MARCUS: A side view.  And yes, this is the same harness and leashes (2) I slipped out of last Friday.  (Marcus Houdini)

MARCUS:  Another side view.  Do you think this is my better side?

MERCI:  *sigh*  How does everything end up being about you?

PERCY:  So what are we thankful for this week?

CYNDI:  I think we're thankful Jan and the older dogs finally met a friendly dog on a walk so Jan wasn't "beaten up" during the encounter.

Stop by Pepi Smart Dog for the Thankful Thursday blog hop.  (There is always something to be thankful for!)

And stop by Ruckus the Eskie, Love is being owned by a husky, and Barking from the bayou for the Thoughtless Thursday blog hop. 

Wednesday, October 14, 2015

Marcus Houdini

MICAH:  Last week was not one of Jan's favorites.  On Tuesday, she lost two of three dogs during one walk.  (Packing Jan's Brain)

RUSTY:  On Thursday, she stood before a group and adjourned a meeting instead of opening it.  (Bloopers, Winners and Cat Chats)

CYNDI:  On Friday, we heard a rumor she allowed Marcus to strip down to nothing but a collar in public.

PERCY:  I'm starting to wish I could join Jan and the dogs on their walks just to see some of what goes on when we aren't around.

MARCUS:  Rumors of my nakedness were greatly exaggerated.  Oh, wait, no they weren't, but that was Jan's fault.  I only stripped down to one leash.

BUDDY:  We pass that gate every morning on our walk.  But we haven't seen a guard there before.  What did you do, Marcus?

MARCUS:  Me?  I didn't do anything.  And that isn't a guard.  That is Debbie.  She worked at the mill some years ago, then she married and moved away.  She was visiting her aunt and stopped by to take some pictures and relive some happy memories.

SAM:  It's a good thing she stopped by when she did.  There isn't anything left of that particular building except the front wall and that will be coming down too.

MERCI:  It's sad there has been so much vandalism over these last years.  The windows have been broken.  The fence is still solid and standing, though.  It must be sad for someone who once worked there to see it in such terrible shape and to know it will soon be gone, nothing but a memory.

MARCUS:  Hello?  I thought you wanted to hear how I ended up almost nude.

MERCI:  *sigh*  We do.  Go ahead.

MARCUS:  Well, I was taking Jan for an evening stroll when we ran into Debbie.  She and Jan got to talking about when the mill was alive and vibrant.  Jan had never been inside the mill but Debbie told her stories of when she (Debbie) worked there.

SAM:  Get to the point of the story, Marcus.  Nudity in a small town.

MARCUS:  I am getting to the point, but I had to lay some background first.  You know how two human females are when they start gabbing.  They forgot all about me.

BUDDY:  And I take it that since you were not the center of attention, you did something to shift the attention onto you.  Right?

MARCUS:  Sort of.  After they talked for a while, Jan took some pictures and while she was writing down her information for Debbie, she looked down at me and there I was, looking up at her wearing nothing but one leash attached to my collar.  Just like in the above photo.

BUDDY:  But you left here wearing a harness with one leash clipped to the front of the harness and your collar, and with a second leash attached to the back of the harness.   How did you take it off, Houdini?

MARCUS:  That's my secret. Jan unclipped the front leash from the harness while she tried to figure out how to get me dressed again.  A few minutes later she suddenly realized I was naked.  Yep, when she unclipped the front leash from the harness, she'd also unclipped it from my collar and I was just sitting there watching her wearing nothing but a smile. Uh, perhaps I should clarify that - I was wearing nothing but a smile. 

SAM:  Oh, it's too bad you didn't ... I mean, it's a good thing you didn't take advantage of the situation and run away before she got you dressed again.

MARCUS:  I hope Jan learned her lesson.  Two leashes attached to my harness and two eyes on me at all times!

Monday, October 12, 2015

Wellness Trufood

MARCUS:  Hey, Jan, there's food on top of my dining car.  Would you pass me a bowl, please?

SAM:  Oh, no, what a time for someone to knock at the door!  Jan, nooooooo, don't put the food in the fridge!

MERCI:  Jan, stop talking and come back inside!  We're starving!

BUDDY:  This is torture.  First we had to wait for Jan to move things around and find her camera, and then open the bowls.  And just as we were on the verge of taste testing some Wellness Trufood, Jan just had to answer the door.

MERCI:  You have to admit, she didn't have much choice.  The front door was wide open to let in some light and there was nowhere to hide.  She'll be back - soon, I hope.

SAM:  Hey, you guys ought to read the package.  This sounds pretty good.  Grain and wheat free.  No fillers. 

MARCUS:  Can you push one of those empty packages through the bars of my dining car?  This says there are two layers - shredded protein + diced fruit.

BUDDY:  No artificial preservatives, colors or flavors.  Pumpkin, lamb and duck.  Sounds tasty.  Jan, hurry up!

SAM:  It's about time!  We could have all died of starvation, you know, Jan!

MERCI:  Shhh, you don't want to distract her or it will be dinnertime before we get breakfast.

BUDDY:  Mfffmph!  Mmmmm.

MARCUS:  I'm feeling a bit faint.  Do you think you could find the camera shutter button so I can eat, Jan?

SAM:  You don't look faint to me, Marcus.  You look hungry.

MARCUS:  Mmmmmm.

MERCI:  Marcus always looks hungry.  According to the package, Jan should feed us three of these bowls per 6 lbs of body weight.

SAM:  Or she could feed us each one and reduce our kibble by about 1/4 cup each.

BUDDY:  Jan is absent-minded so perhaps she'll forget to reduce our kibble when she fixes the rest of our breakfast.

MARCUS:  We all agree that the Wellness Trufood bowls are great with breakfast!

We have not been paid for this review and any opinions expressed are our own. did provide us with a box of Wellness Trufood to taste test.