Not Your Apartment

Percy:  This is my latest apartment.  I've been living in it since the weather turned cold and wet.

Micah:  It's a laundry basket, Percy, not your apartment!

Percy:  It's a very cozy apartment with a widow view.  And sometimes there is sunshine.

Micah:  I can enjoy the same sunshine from my latest apartment.

Percy:  That's not your apartment.  That's Jan's bed.

Micah:  Yes, I have it to myself all day.  Jan puts the gates on to keep Marcus off the bed in the daytime.  If she forgets, he sneaks in here and makes himself at home. 

Marcus:  Jan, that's MY top sheet.  It isn't fair.  If I'm not allowed on MY top sheet during the day, Micah should be evicted until bedtime too.  Please let me chase him off MY sheet!

Taylor:  Cyndi, why do the guys have such a hard time with living arrangements?

Cyndi:  It must be a guy thing.  You and I seem to the the only ones around here that actually sleep in the beds Jan gave us. 

Taylor:  Have you ever considered spreading your wings and sleeping somewhere different?

Cyndi:  If I did, I would  be squashed.

Taylor:  How would that happen?

Cyndi:  Marcus would mistake my wings for his new pillow.

We are participating in Happy Tuesday blog hop. Stop by Comedy Plus to see other posts or to join the fun.

An Innocent Bysleeper

Merci:  This was me Wednesday afternoon between morning and past everyone's bedtime storms.  I was really soaking up some zzzzzs.

Marcus:  This is what my bed looked like when we all woke up Thursday morning.  And before you blame me, I never sleep in my crate at night.  But a certain little redhead does much of the time.

Merci:  Do you mean Rusty?  I understand an orange tabby is actually called "red". 

Marcus:  No, I mean you, Merci!  You slept in my bed.  It was already duct taped together on the back and Jan just recently sewed half the top back together.

Merci:  I know where Jan keeps the duct tape.

Marcus:  It's waaaaaaaay past sewing or taping together.  You owe me a new bed!

Merci:   But I didn't do anything.  I just turned over the bedding and dug a little to make the bedding more comfortable.  It must have exploded while I was sleeping.

Marcus:  Yeah, sure.  You weren't harmed but the bed exploded all the way to the kitchen. That sounds like one of my tales.

Merci:  I'm so glad you're my brother!  You understand I was just an innocent bysleeper.

Marcus:  A "bysleeper"? 

Merci:  Yes, you know, a sleeping bystander.

Taylor:  We have a Mousebreath interview with Teddy Westlife posted today.  Some of you will remember his older sisfur Huffle Mawson. 

Percy:  Stop by Mousebreath to meet SuperFluff Teddy Westlife.  He used to write the Don't Bite blog, but now he is the silent partner on the Cats With Blogs Facebook page. 



We are joining the Pet Parade hosted by Rascal and Rocco, Basil the Bionic Cat, Barking from the Bayou and Owned by a husky.

Guilty or Innocent Marcus

Percy:  I'm going to lie her comfortably and listen as Marcus narrates today's mystery.  See if you can figure out who is responsible for the destruction of private property.  If you need a hint, you already know the culprit.

Marcus:  In November, we dogs all got a new bed because someone had destroyed all the old ones.

This was mine.  A nice soft extra large bed Jan would fold in half for extra padding and warmth in my crate.

And then one morning, I discovered my bed flipped over and the bottom ripped open.  

Yes, ripped open!  The material on the bottom is as thin as tissue paper and could not be sewn, so Jan used duct tape to put it back together.  She folded my bed so the soft, warm side was up once again.

And again the bed was flipped over and another hole was dug in the bottom.

And yet again!  And again!  This is what the bottom of my bed looks like now.  And I had absolutely nothing to do with it. 

Percy:  Yes, Marcus had absolutely nothing to do with it. 

Marcus:  Are you making fun of me?

Percy:  No, I'm just repeating your statement of innocence.  You are innocent, aren't you?

Marcus:  You know I am!

Percy:  So if you are innocent, who is the guilty party?

Marcus:  The same one who destroyed all the beds so Jan had to buy new ones for the winter.  And she should go to jail.

Percy:  Jan should go to jail?

Marcus:  No, little Miss Messy Merci who keeps sleeping in my bed!  I thought old folks are supposed to be quiet and neat, but instead of knitting, she took up digging in bedding and shredding it. 

Percy: We did a whole series on Merci's vandalism last year.  (I think the final one was Dust Mites Exonerated.)  I know you all thought Marcus was guilty, but in this case he is the victim, not the perpetrator.  

Marcus:  Do I get a reward for that? 

Percy:  For being a victim?  I don't think there is such a reward.

Marcus:  For being assumed guilty until proven innocent. 

Percy:  How about if you get to keep what's left of your bed?

Marcus:  How about cash?

Inspector Buddy

Rusty:  Buddy and Merci have had a turn to show off their new beds.  (The Perfect Size  and  Musical Beds)   Today Marcus gets to show off his.  Jan brought it home just over a week ago.

Marcus:  Buddy, what are you doing in my bed?

Buddy:  I'm the official bed inspector/tester here.  You can't have a new bed unless I make sure it's safe.

Marcus:  How could it not be safe?

Buddy:  It could bite.

Marcus:  How many times have you ever been bitten by a bed?

Buddy:  Well, never, but it could happen!  

Marcus::  Thank you for inspecting my new bed but it's time to go sleep in your own.

Buddy:  Okay.  I'll send you my bill.

Marcus: Hey, Jan, can we get some better light over here?  Oh, okay, but I'll remember this when you need me to model again..

Rusty:  Don't worry.  Your friends will understand you have to work with what you have and what you have is Jan.

Marcus:  This is my new bed.  Jan, I'm a big guy.  I'm also the star of this post, yet you missed me.  No, my shoulder doesn't count as on target.

Buddy:  Oh, I don't know.  It's kind of nice to see a headless picture of you.

Marcus:  Here I am in my new bed.  Finally!

Buddy:  Yes, we dogs got new beds for early Christmas presents, and just in time.  It's going down into the 20sF for the next couple of nights.  It's going to be cold in here.  What am I saying?  It's already cold in here.

Rusty:  Jan said if she needs to buy anything else, she'll have to rob a bank, but one of you dogs will have to drive the getaway car.  Marcus, I hope you have a license because the rest of us will never get in a car with Buddy in the front seat again!

Marcus:  A license?  We don't even have a car!


We are joining the Pet Parade hosted by Rascal and Rocco, Basil the Bionic Cat, Barking from the Bayou and Owned by a husky.

The Perfect Size

Merci:  You might remember I was recently accused of de-stuffing all our beds.  (Doxies in White Coats and Dust Mites Exonerated)

Buddy:  Accused?  You were guilty!

Cyndi:  Jan felt sorry for you in the cold and bought you a Merci-sized new bed and Buddy a big, soft, puffy bed for Christmas.  You were always in his bed and Buddy had to keep getting Jan to chase you out so Buddy could sleep in his own bed.  (Musical Beds)

Merci:  Well, Buddy's bed was nicer than my bed.  Soft, warm. roomy, and higher off the cold floor.

Buddy:  Jan was so upset with you for de-struffing all our beds she said she will not buy you another one if you go de-stuffing again.

Merci:  Jan didn't mean it.  She came home Tuesday with a big, soft, puffy bed for me, one just like Buddy's.

Buddy:  Actually, we all know how forgetful she is, but she says she decided it's Christmas and Merci really, really, really wanted one of those beds.

Merci:   She came home with one Tuesday.  She woke me in my small bed and I thought I was being evicted again and walked away.

Cyndi: And guess who came lumbering and grumbling across the room, complaining that he is the official bed tester?  Yep, Buddy.  Jan chased him off and made sure Merci got to curl up in her new bed.  This is what she saw a few minutes later when she turned back to check on Merci.  Merci is the small red blob on the far side of Buddy.

Buddy:  Well, I have always been the official bed tester until recently when Merci started getting a bit senile and forgot her place in the scheme of this pack.  I did my duty!  I tested the bed and approved it.

Merci:  It's about time Buddy moved to his own bed so I can stretch out and enjoy some space.  Buddy was really thankful for his soft bed and  now I'm really thankful for mine.

Cyndi:  Uh, Merci, are you aware there is also room on that bed for all of us felines and there would still be room left over?

Merci:  You must need glasses.  Anyone can see this bed is just the perfect size for me.


We are joining the Thankful Thursday blog hop at Brian's Home. 

Musical Beds

Life on the Funny Farm.

If you remember, Merci de-stuffed the dog beds recently. (Miss Messy Destuffs)   It got cold here for a couple of days and it will soon get colder, so Jan took pity and bought two new dog beds with her share of our grocery money.  Marcus didn't need a new bed because the "dust mites" left most of his bed intact.  (Dust Mites Exonerated)

So why is there no photo of Buddy is his new bed?  Buddy's old legs were having a hard time climbing onto his puffy bed that first night.  Jan was concerned and forgot to take photos. He doesn't have any trouble now, except he has to go get Jan to come remove Merci so he can sleep in his own bed. 

Just for the record, there is nothing wrong with Merci's new bed.  She just prefers Buddy's bigger, softer one.  That cost three times more than hers.  

And now perhaps you understand why Jan blames us for the loss of her marbles.

(Click on the two graphics to enlarge.)

  
We are joining the Pet Parade hosted by Rascal and Rocco, Basil the Bionic Cat, Barking from the Bayou and Owned by a husky.