Marcus: Hey, Marcus the friendly feline posing pretty for the camera. .
Percy: You aren't a feline. You're a canine.
Marcus: Today I am a feline.
Percy: You're just trying to steal our post.
Marcus: Steal it? That's a bit harsh. How about "borrow" it?
Marcus: I wanted everyone to see how strong and handsome I look when I hold Jan's hand.
Percy: You mean when Jan holds your paw because you're nervous about something.
Marcus: I'm never nervous. It's a form of communication. Such as when I leap into the back seat of my suv, Jan holds my paw for a moment while I reassure her she doesn't have to be nervous about driving.
Percy:And when you grab her hand when she opens the door to let you out of the back seat?
Marcus: That's my way of thanking her for bringing me home in one piece.
Percy: How many pieces do you expect to be in when you get home?
Marcus: You should hear the traffic. Horns blaring, tires squealing, sirens screaming. And that's before we roll off the curb into the street. It's gotten so bad I ride curled into a ball with my paws over my ears to keep me calm.
Percy: I think you're exaggerating, but is that why she rushes you in the front door and out the back - because you're calm?
Marcus: No, she rushes me out the back door because I have to pee.
Feline Friday at Comedy Plus.