Thursday, February 18, 2016

Marcus the Menace

PERCY:  Imagine Jan's surprise when she was walking the dogs on Sunday (Valentine's Day) and Marcus stopped to look behind them.  Jan stopped to see what he was looking at and thought, "Oh, no, another loose dog."

MICAH:  And then she had one of those not again panic moments.  Buddy was strolling, nose to the ground, several yards behind them.  How long had he been wandering alone?


BUDDY:  This time Jan didn't drop the leash.  It snapped.  The camera she carries on walks died so she had to wait till we were home before she could grab a couple of shots. The brown blur on the left was Marcus trying to contain his excitement around a leash.


MARCUS:  Here let me sniff a broken end.  There may be a clue as to what was wrong with it.  Oh, by the way, the brown and white furry blob under my chin is not a misplaced goatee; it's the top of Buddy's head and ears.

CYNDI:  Monday - the very next day - the same thing happened, only this time it was Merci's leash that snapped. 


MERCI:  Jan made me pose outside.  I was so ashamed I tried to cower against the screen door.  I didn't do anything wrong but I just know she thinks I broke it.


MARCUS:  Don't worry, Merci.  I'll explain to Jan that it wasn't your fault.  The leash must have been defective.

RUSTY:  You'll explain?  I hope you  mean you'll confess.

MARCUS:  Confess?  I was leading the pack each time a leash broke. 

RUSTY:  Every time Jan takes the leashes down and tries to get you dogs ready to walk her, you run around biting on the leashes.  You're like a human baby, everything you see goes into your mouth. You grab leashes because you're excited, because the others don't walk fast enough, to try to turn them in another direction ... just because they exist.  Your name should be changed to "Drop It"

MERCI:  Jan has soaked the leashes in cayenne pepper, even sprayed bitter something or other on them, but nothing stops you from grabbing and biting leashes.

MARCUS:  Are you trying to say those broken leashes were MY fault?

TAYLOR:  They're not trying to say that.  They are saying it.  You have also been chewing on my toys and de-stuffing them.  Marcus, you're a menace!

MARCUS:  Aw, guys, I should be a hero.  If I hadn't been nipping at the leashes, we wouldn't have learned they were defective.

CYNDI:  We might as well give up, guys.  Marcus has sharp teeth and an insanity defense.


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31 comments:

  1. Oh, My goodness!

    Chewed leashes are not a good way to go for a stroll...good thing you figured out that those leashes may need armor to keep whole...

    The sure is nevfur a dull moment at Jan's Funny Farm!!

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    1. You would be surprised how many dull moments there are here. But we're full of stories about Jan.

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  2. Hari OM
    Hmmmmm... maybe there needs to be a dedicated chew-rag for when the leashes come out. As soon as you are tempted to go for them Marcus, Jan can push that into your mouth and you might learn that - and only that- gets chewed in excitement! Glad Buddy and Merci didn't take advantage of the situation - or you'd've been getting blame for more than nibbling!!! Hugs and wags, YAM-aunty xxx

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    Replies
    1. What a good idea. Jan could coat it with chicken and I could snack.

      Marcus

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  3. Marcus you MUST have lions teeth cos we never ever knew leashes could be chewed into......or else we haves baby teef.
    stella rose, p.s. glad you all stayed wif your momma though.

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  4. "drop it" haha Oh Marcus....you are creating havoc

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    Replies
    1. I have other nicknames but I can't remember them at the moment.

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  5. My, but you all are for sure having some leash issues. We hope you can get something figured out so that doesn't happen again. We are glad all of you made it back home safely. Sweet Marcus did you really chew the leashes? We think they were defective...you wouldn't do that would you? Hugs and nose kisses

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    1. Yes, yes, definitely defective.

      Marcus

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  6. Marcus, Marcus, how do you do it ? What kind of teeth do you have ? We're glad you all stayed with Jan. Purrs

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  7. Maybe Jan should try a titanium leash - do they make those? What about one made of kevlar. I'll be those won't break!!

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    Replies
    1. Can I chew my way through them? If not, we don't need them.

      Marcus

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  8. Dang, y'all are being a bit snappy fur sure!

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    1. Yep, that's us, very snappy. Oh, you mean the leashes? We thought you meant we are dapper. :)

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  9. We think it is a quality control issue with the leashes!

    Keep Calm & Bark On!

    Murphy & Stanley

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yes, definitely a quality control issue! Not my fault.

      Marcus

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  10. Oh we're just glad there were no mishaps!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Not half as glad as we are. Jan could have gotten lost and who would have fixed our dinner?

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  11. Sorry yous leashes broke. We's glad nuffin' happened while y'all were walkin'. Me's harness has broke a kupple times. Fankfully never when me wuld be in danger. Mommy keeps a real close eye on them now.

    Luv ya'

    Dezi and Lexi

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. We're glad too. And glad nothing bad happened to you.

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  12. Oh Marcus, maybe you should be renamed Jaws!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yes, yes, yes, YES! Jaws. It's perfect.

      Merci

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  13. Fight nice guys. It was probably an accident!

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  14. Well, Marcus, I always have to take your side because, well, I'm a little partial to your humor and your naivety about leashes and such and I think the only thing that will help is a teeth guard...you know those things the dentists can make for you so that you don't grit your teeth when you sleep. But in this case it will be a day guard. What do you think?

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  15. Well Marcus, Mom had to have double thick leashes for Oskar and his brother when they were alive because they liked to carry them in their mouths and chewed through one.

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  16. Dang, Marcus. We're not sure why it's YOUR fault. Those leashes must be deficient!

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