Split the Difference

BUDDY:  I think we should fire Jan again.  She has clearly not learned a lesson from previous firings.

MARCUS:  Why, what did she do this time?

BUDDY:  I asked her to please take a photo of Merci miming STOP with one paw raised for a special post.

MARCUS:  Oh, that's what Merci was doing.  I thought she was trying to stop Jan from taking her picture.

BUDDY:  A simple photo to take.  But did Jan do it?

MARCUS:  Uh ... I'm guessing no?

BUDDY:  Anyone can see that Merci is short.  A human would have to get down to Merci's level to get a picture of her with raised paw.

MARCUS:  To be fair, Jan has creaky joints.  Perhaps she couldn't bend that low at the time.

BUDDY:  Don't defend her, Marcus.  She failed miserably.  Look at this picture and tell me you see Merci's paw.

MARCUS:  Do I have to?

BUDDY:  *shakes head* Of course not! 

MARCUS:  I think that photo is a lot better than the other one.

BUDDY:   There's another picture?  Perhaps we can use that one.

MARCUS:  I don't think so.  Jan cut off Merci's body and her nose.

BUDDY:  Yes, we should definitely fire Jan.  Or at least dock her pay.

MARCUS:  We can't dock her pay - we don't pay her.

BUDDY:  That's because we don't have any money.  If we did, we would pay her for all the things she forgets to do, wouldn't we?

MARCUS:  I suppose we would.

BUDDY:  Then what's the problem?  We'll just dock her what we haven't paid her.  She can't remember what she had for lunch.  She won't remember how much she doesn't get paid.

MARCUS:  How about we split the difference so I can order a new soccer ball?