The Screwdriver

SAM:  Hey, Rusty, you look deep in thought.  

RUSTY:  I'm just thinking about how fortunate we are that Jan is forgetful but at least she hasn't lost all her marbles. 

SAM:  I'm not sure what you mean.

RUSTY: Well, Jan forgets to read the calendar and she sometimes forgets to feed us on time, but she's not a stupid criminal.

SAM:  Are you suggesting she's an intelligent criminal?

RUSTY:  No, I'm not suggesting she's any kind of a criminal.  I'm just saying I'm glad she has some common sense even if she can't remember where she left it.

SAM:  I don't think I'm following this.  What do you mean?

RUSTY:  I was just reading about the guy who handed a note demanding money to a bank teller.

SAM:  Let me guess.  The teller couldn't read?

RUSTY:  No, the teller could read.  It's just the guy wrote the note on the back of a deposit slip from his wife's bank account.

SAM:  And you think Jan might write a robbery note on the back of her own deposit slip?

RUSTY:  Don't be silly.  Jan would make a lousy criminal.  She can't run and she doesn't have a getaway car.

SAM:  Whatever you do, don't mention that to Buddy.  He'd want to be the getaway driver and we all know what a menace he is behind the wheel.

BUDDY:  Did I hear you guys say you need a getaway driver? What's the caper? I have a driver's license, you know.

RUSTY:  A screw driver, Buddy.  We're helping to fix the squeaky wheel in the  ... uh, whatchamacallit. 

SAM:  Yes, catch you later.  Jan needs a screwdriver right away in the ...

RUSTY:  ... kitchen.

SAM:  ...dog pen.