Cyndi: Before we begin, we want to make it clear we are all innocent!
Buddy: You mean we canines are innocent. The identity of the feline culprit has not been established.
Micah: We can get back to this subject later but we need to do our post for today first.
Percy: We always thought Cotton was beautiful and should be in the movies, so for our art subject today, we turned her photo into cinemascope. We miss you, sweet girl.
Marcus: Are we done? Can we tell everyone now what we didn't do? I want everyone to know I had absolutely no part in it. It's not that I wouldn't have been napping there if I could, but I can't climb that high. And I wasn't even in the kitchen at the time. So there's no way to blame anything that happened Friday on me.
Sam: That's true for Friday, but Thursday night you did a number on Jan's left knee.
Marcus: I'm sorry about that. I leaped for her lap, lost my balance and slid down her knee. There wouldn't have been so much blood if Jan had remembered to cut my nails.
Rusty: Is this a guessing game or are we going to tell what happened? Jan was attacked by an ice chest -- with claws! And by the way, Jan doesn't consider me a suspect either. The only ones in the kitchen at the time were Jan and the innocent perp.
Micah: Isn't "innocent perp" an oxymoron?
Merci: Since Jan believes the most likely innocent perp is Cameron ... Percy ... or even Micah, let's call him "Anonymous" and let him tell everyone what happened.
Cyndi: *whisper, whisper* It seems our innocent perp is afraid to tell the story for fear of retribution by Jan, but he has agreed to wear a bedsheet to hide his identity.
Anonymous: You guys couldn't find a smaller bedsheet? I'm liable to trip and break a leg wearing this.
Sam: Just tell the truth..
Anonymous: I was taking a mid-afternoon snooze on the edge of the big ice chest on the refrigerator. Suddenly the ice chest moved, I slid down, hit something solid, kicked out, hit the floor, ran and hid. It was a terrifying hour and a half!
Buddy: It was probably more like a second and a half. Talk about an abridged confession.
Cameron: I ... uh, I believe what actually happened is that Jan opened the freezer door and the ice chest fell forward onto her head, the innocent perp slid off, landed on her eye, stomped it ... er, pushed off just as her hand came up to protect herself so her arm got scratched up, the freezer door slammed into her shoulder, the ice chest bounced off her shoulder, and ... she says her knee hurts? (Not the one Marcus clawed.)
Rusty: Everything happened so fast she never saw which cat "punched" her in the eye and did some minor claw work on her face.
Percy: It was one of those freak accidents Jan excels at. Fortunately, no cats were harmed in the taking of the above selfie. We thought we would post it since some of you have asked why we don't share photos of Jan.
We are also joining Ruckus the Eskie for the Sepia Saturday blog hop. http://www.ruckustheeskie.com