Buddy: For once it isn't me that's in trouble over food.
Sam: Or me. Jan is a bit upset with me for tossing the big water bowl around and soaking the wood floor and carpet just as she was leaving for church yesterday, but that was an accident. My tag caught the underside of the bowl and it scared me when I tried to walk away.
Cameron: So that's who made the wet mess in the living room. Glad I missed that.
Merci: At least you missed the heater. You'd be wearing the Guilty Hat too if you had doused the pilot light after Jan finally turned on the heat.
Marcus: Hey, why do I get blamed for everything? How do you know it wasn't Merci who ate your food, guys?
Cyndi: Don't try to shift the blame. Merci is too short to reach the table. And Jan caught you red-pawed!
Marcus: It wasn't me. It must have been my doppelgänger.
Micah: You don't have a dapple hanger or whatever you said. You're so bad none would want to be associated with you.
Percy: Tell the truth, Marcus. Jan mixes our canned food and goodies all in one bowl. She hit the wrong buttons on the microwave and boiled the water she was going to add. While it cooled, she left the room for a minute to find something and when she returned your front paws were on the table and you were licking your chops.
Rusty: Our bowl of our food was empty. You ate your own breakfast and the breakfast of 5 cats.
Cameron: I was on top of the fridge, so I'm a witness. You're a thief and a pig, Marcus! You deserve to wear the Guilty Hat of shame.
Buddy: *drops a paw on Marcus' shoulder* Marcus, Sam and I have taught you well. But don't ever forget you can steal food anywhere and anytime ... unless it's in Sam's or my bowl.