Comments on Billy' Sweetfeets

Yesterday's post on Billy's Brain Surgery brought some interesting comments. We're still exhausted so we're just going to share some of them with you today.

Eric & Flynn left a message on The Meezer's blog: We googled green spots in the brain and it appears that Billy has been taken over by aliens!

We left a comment at the Meezer's too: Hey, guys, we're relieved to read Eric & Flynn's comment above. So that's what happened to Billy's brain. We're glad you enjoyed the surgical experience, Billy. Or at least most of it. We hope your head isn't too sore today. Miles & Sammy, we hope you are happy your little brother is home safe and sound. Buddy turned out to be a very competent surgeon. Much more competent than when he tried plumbing. (You can read about that at The BMP Plumbing Service.) Billy's The Mom Lady, we know you are taking good care of Billy's booboo. Thanks again for your permission. (s) Dr. Buddy & the rest of the FF

Annie, Mollie & Gyp think the green dots are smart pills Billy takes to fool people.

Freckles & Deb wonder if those green spots give him his great dancing talent which only shows up on Tuesdays.

Khyra regrets not being there for the surgery. Her excessive shedding in the operating room wouldn't have been a problem. And perhaps she could have taken Cyndi's place while she was unconscious.

Sweet Asta was so overcome by the scary saga she fainted several times while reading it.

MissBreezyBox believes the spots might be M&Ms he ate.

The Meezers disagree over whether those green spots are the jelly beans Miles tried to shove in Billy's ears or they are mold and Billy needs to see a brainwashing specialist for a brain bleach.

Dr. Buddy will always treasure Billy's comment: huh, maybe that's why ME always sees green spots. ME hadded fun!! well, exsept the head smashing and the bleeding. and the staple gun. but ofur than that ME hadded a good time.

The general consensus seems to be that everyone loves Billy Sweetfeets just as he is. And we agree.

Dr. Buddy: I am so glad you had a good time, Billy. And I appreciate you and your family allowing me to do exploratory surgery on Billy. It was my first operation and I know all my friends and family expected me to fail. But I succeeded. Even in the midst of chaos -- Cyndi barfing on me, Percy mistaking the operating table for a litter box in his shock at the sight of spurting blood, Crystal supplying coffee filters instead of cotton -- I am finally vindicated as the Funny Farm klutz. I have found my niche. The only question now is ..... who will be my next patient?

Jan finally got one photo partly done in PhotoShop Elements yesterday. And then she discovered there is no text editor so she couldn't finish it. So she was not a happy "creator" yesterday. So again we just didn't get to visit.


We borrowed this photo from the Cat Blogosphere. Thanks.

Except we did try to stop by Alasandra & the Cats & Dog blog after Jan saw Khyra's comment on Facebook that Charbydis had died. It was a shock to all of us. Their butterfly wouldn't even let us read the post. For some reason it often locks up our browser. Jan was beating the mouse on the desk in frustration. But Khyra sent us a copy of the post. There is a special blog set up to leave photos, and/or memories of Charbydis. There are no other details. Whatever happened, it was evidently sudden and unexpected. We send warm purrs and tail wags to our good friends Socks, Scylla, Fenris and their family.

P.S. Miss Pat

Yesterday we said we would post the second half of the message Miss Pat sent us. (You can read the first part here.) This second part is why we decided to forgive her for attempting to cause problems for us with the first half. We don’t know what got into her. She is usually a very nice person. So why she would want to give Jan any rebellious ideas is beyond our comprehension.

To All Non-Pet Owners Who Visit & Like to Complain About Our Pets :

1. They live here. You don't.

2. If you don't want their hair on your clothes, stay off the furniture

(That's why they call it "fur"niture.)

3. I like my pets a lot better than I like most people.

4. To you, it's an animal. To me, he/she is an adopted son/daughter who is short, hairy, walks on all fours and doesn't speak clearly.

Remember: In many ways, dogs and cats are better than kids because they:

1. Eat less
2. Don't ask for money all the time
3. Are easier to train
4. Normally come when called
5. Never ask to drive the car
6. Don't hang out with drug-using friends
7. Don't smoke or drink
8. Don't have to buy the latest fashions
9. Don't want to wear your clothes
10. Don't need a "gazillion" dollars for college.
And finally -
11. If they get pregnant, you can sell their children

Oh, I guess we need to make some corrections to this list too, but only to the last part.

1. Some of us eat less. Buddy eats more.

2. Cameron is always asking for money for the club treasury.

3. Have you ever tried to train a hyperactive bundle of hyperactivity named Buddy? Or a curl up in a ball, don’t kill me, I surrender Merci? Or a tail whomping circus act named Samaritan? Or a ...cat?

4. We do come when called – if we’re in the mood… if there isn’t anything better on TV….if Jan isn’t being punished.

5. Well, this one is correct. We never ask to drive the car. But we have borrowed it. (Farming Michael Vick Continued)

6 – 8. We hold a perfect record in these three items.

9. We don’t actually want to wear Jan’s clothes, just sleep on them when they are clean and fresh-smelling.

10. We don’t especially want to go to college, but we would like to send Buddy to trade school, perhaps to learn how to properly plumb. (The BMP Plumbing Service)

11. No, Jan can’t sell our offspring. She had us all farmed. (Buddy is Farmed)

(s) The Funny Farm residents

THE BMP PLUMBING SERVICE

THE BMP PLUMBING SERVICE
Copyright 2005 Janice Price


“Mmm, this is the life,” Buddy breathes, as he rolls onto his side and stretches in the warm sunshine.

“Yes,” Merci agrees. She leaps deftly to her feet to avoid Buddy’s flailing feet. “This is my favorite time of the year.”

Percy nips the paw Buddy has shoved into his side and ignores Buddy’s yelp of protest. “It won’t be long before it will be too cold to stretch out in front of the screen door and sleep in the sun. It’s going to be a long, boring winter.”

“Oh, it won’t be boring,” Buddy says with assurance. “I have decided what I want to do with my life.”

“Eat!” Merci and Percy laugh.

“No, seriously, guys,” Buddy protests, “ever since Mr. Landlord was here the other day, I have been thinking of becoming a plumber.”

“Mr. Landlord? Oh, you mean our landlord.” Percy cocks his head. “No, he can’t be our landlord. Jan pays the rent. He must be her landlord.”

“But Mr. Landlord isn’t a plumber. We heard him tell Jan he’s a contractor.”

Buddy rolls onto his stomach and watches a squirrel sit on a porch step and eat a pecan. “But, Merci, he replaced the kitchen faucet when he was here. He’s a plumber!”

Merci shakes her head. “Just because he knows how to turn on and off the water, that doesn’t make him a plumber. He just got lucky.”

“No! If you remember, I helped him. I showed him where the leak was. I barked for Jan to fetch a rag to clean up the water after he pulled everything out from under the sink. I even reminded him to go buy a new faucet before he took out the old one. It’s a good thing I was there, peering under the sink, watching him. He might have fallen asleep under there if I hadn’t kept knocking things over and nudging him along.”

Percy laughs. “You’re right, Buddy. He couldn’t have done the job without you.”

“Go ahead and laugh now. You won’t laugh when I have money in my – Oh, I forgot, I don’t have pockets. But I’m going to have money to spend.”

“Can I earn some money too?”

Buddy looks indignant. “You’re a girl, Merci. Girls don’t do plumbing. Did you see the size of that wrench Mr. Landlord carried outside to turn off the water at the meter? It probably weighs more than you do!”

“Well, I could do something. Mop up the water spills, hand you the lightweight tools, whatever you need that I can handle.”

Buddy thinks a moment and changes his mind. “Yes, it would be nice to have an employee. You could be my secretary and make my appointments. Cameron, the Funny Farm Writing Club Treasurer, can’t count higher than his toes yet. Maybe you can also do the billing and balance the books. You can add, can’t you?”

Merci nods her head, growing excited at the prospect of having a career.

“Well, if you two are going to work together and have spending money, I want a position too.”

“Okay, Percy, you can be the one who mops up the water spills, hands me the tools and whatever else I need help doing.”

“Just don’t ask me to bring you a wrench like Mr. Landlord carried. I’m smaller than Merci, remember.”

“If we’re going to start a business, we need a name for it.”

“I know, Buddy, we can call it Percy and Buddy’s Plumbing Company.”

“Hey, you forgot my name,” Merci complains.

“But you’re only the secretary.”

“Buddy, if you don’t include my name in the company title, I’ll tell Cameron you need a bookkeeper.”

“Okay, okay. We’ll include your name. The Buddy, Percy, Merci Plumbing Company.”

“That sounds terrible,” Percy says. “We need something with class, like PBM Plumbing Company.”

Buddy rises to his feet and stretches to look as tall and masculine as possible. “This is my idea. It’s my company. My name goes first! And to be fair to you two, we’ll do it in alphabetical order. Buddy, Merci, Percy Plumbing Company.”

“That sounds terrible too, Buddy. The name weighs more than Mr. Landlord’s wrench.”

“What about the BMP Plumbing Service?” Merci asks.

Buddy mulls over the name. “BMP Plumbing Service. Hmmm, I like that. It’s easy to spell also. Does that sound all right to you, Percy?”

“Yes, I like that name. I can print some business cards. This should be fun. When do we start?”

“Just as soon as we get a client,” Buddy beams. “I can’t wait to get started. After all, how hard can it be to plumb? We can learn as we go. This should be fun.”

Percy and Merci exchange a nervous glance. Buddy’s schemes tend to go awry.

“In fact, we can practice here at home,” Buddy announces confidently. “The faucet in the bathtub has to be replaced. Let’s surprise Jan and fix it for her.”

Merci climbs to her feet and slowly follows Buddy into the bathroom. “One way or another, Jan is definitely going to be surprised!”

Percy,
Secretary to the Funny Farm Writing Club