Percy: Well, I see you have retained your passion for beating up shopping carts. And Jan.
Marcus: I have never beaten up Jan!
Percy: Save your breath. I witnessed it through the window with my own eyes this time. Plus you stomped her foot injury for the umpteenth time.
Marcus: I had nothing to do with that foot accident.
Percy: The original one, no. She knocked a 19 ounce can of liquid off an overhead shelf and it bounced on her foot. But for the past 5 1/2 weeks you have been keeping it from fully healing.
Marcus: Wow! I didn't realize. Do you think I should order her a new foot from Amazon?
Percy: I think you should let her walk on her own feet. And what possessed you to attack the shopping cart Jan brought home yesterday with a couple of heavy items? You didn't bother it last night when you two set out on a walk.
Marcus: But this morning it got aggressive and growled at me. I couldn't let it get away with that.
Percy: I didn't hear any growling. Just a lot of screaming when you suddenly dived at a cart wheel and yanked the cart backward. As Jan was jerked forward, you body slammed her in the shins, stomped her injured foot and tripped her with your body.
Marcus: But she couldn't have been hurt. She managed to stop her fall before her head hit the ground.
Percy: Marcus, there are more ways to injure a human than splitting her head open.
Marcus: There are? You think that's why she was yelling at me? I didn't think it was fair. She wouldn't let me rush in for a second attack and she didn't take me for a walk either.
Percy: She needed to rest so she could totter back with the cart before you tried to kill her again.
Marcus: Well, none of this would have happened if she had picked a non-aggressive cart to borrow. A shopping cart must be submissive and not growl.
Percy: Of course. Why didn't I think of that? It's not your fault.
Some of you might remember our original shopping cart post - and video! - from 2014. Nothing has changed. Marcus still loves to show a shopping cart who is boss, no matter what. You can view that post and video here. Be glad Jan didn't try to film Marcus spinning/throwing the cart - and Jan - in rapid circles. You would be dizzy too!
Meezer's Mews & Terrieristical Woofs for this lovely graphic for Percy Turns Fifteen.