The Mad Scots Speak

MERCI:  Rah, rah, hiss, broom, bra ...!!!

SAM:  Stop!  What are you yelling about, Merci?

MERCI:  I thought I would start today's post with a cheer.  Do you like my cheerleading outfit?

BUDDY:  I think the skirt is a bit long for your short legs, but otherwise you look fine.

SAM:  But what's this about "hiss, broom, bra"?

MERCI:  I don't understand it either but I listened to a few cheers online and I'm just repeating what some were yelling.

MARCUS:  I'm not an expert on the subject, but you might want to get your hearing checked, Merci. You are a bit old.


SAM:  Yes, definitely have your hearing checked.  That cheer sounds a bit weird, even for humans.

BUDDY:  Well, we thank you anyway, Merci, for opening our post with enthusiasm. We are interviewing the Mad Scots Susie, Sidebite andShadow from Blogville today. Pull up a chair and make yourselves comfortable.

Susie:  Before we start….Let ME just say…it’s best if I, Susie, answer these questions…...it will be better that way.

Funny Farmer Canines:  Please introduce yourselves and your human.

Susie:  Well, I am Susie “Da Sus” known as The Blogville Flash….I am a seven year old non-AKC Scottie Diva…very stubborn…and I always get MY way.

Sidebite:  Hi….my name is Sidebite “Dude”…..I am in charge of Blogville safety,  Top Cop Bites……..I am an 10 year old AKC Scottie…but I would not be trained, no way, no how, never, wasn’t gonna happen!

Mickey:  Then there is me, Mickey “Mick Mick”…. Bites is my half brother, which makes me half nuts and half just plain pawty guy!  I am Blogvilles North American Detective and I work for Bites.  I am an 8 year old AKC Scottie and the family escape artist.

Susie:  The Peeps, who think they are in charge are Mom, Marsha and Dad, Jim….and they are our guardians…aka, the ones who do everything for us…they take care of the home that us pups own!

Funny Farmer Canines:  How did you come to live together?

Susie:  The Nut Case Bites - Mom and Dad have always had a Scottie in their 87 years of marriage………When the last one went to the Bridge, they wanted a pal…….Mom found a new litter of pups, so away they went to see the newborn… One was not yelping……Mom said that’s the one. When he was five weeks old, the lady called and asked if they could come and get him…she had to go out of country for her daughter’s wedding….so along came Sidebite.

Then came Silly ME - Bites bonded with Dad….Three years later, Mom really wanted some pup to bond with her….so she went online and started looking….found a lady with a rescue who said she had this skinny, underfed, scared little Scottie from a puppy mill. So off they drove.  It was like 87 hundred miles. The lady brought me out. Mom took ME in her arms, and I quit shaking……..Mom said we will take her……….on the way home I was wrapped in a warm blankie, next to Mom…the car Radio was playing Credence Clearwater’s “Susie Q”….so that was ME…….Susie.

And, of course, Pawty Guy - Now, Mickey…well he was the pup of their son….but they got another Dog…….and, well, let’s just say the wars were on….so Mom and Dad said that he was coming to live with us before something bad happened.

Funny Farmer Canines:  You are known as the "Mad Scots".  Dare we ask how/why you came by this nickname?

Susie:  That’s an easy one……first we are all Scots……..Mom is half Scot…but we don’t hold that against her. I believe that name came because of me and Bites…..see I am really silly outside running around like krazy…stealing rags out of Dads shop……barking at anything, even the Peeps…….and Bites, he likes to run up the storm shelter and jump off the backside….chase and bark at ME….Dad saw us and said “you guys are mad”….and I said “yes Dad, we are quite Mad, Mad I tell you, Mad….Barharhar”.

Funny Farmer Canines:  Sidebite, you are the Blogville Police Chief.  Please tell us a little about your duties.

Sidebite:  OK, I am The Top Cop, Chief of Police and run the Blogville Safety Department.  Police Commissioner Sarge retired at the end of 2013 and passed this position to me. I run the complete operation with a highly trained and qualified staff. With Mickey’s help….I keep my staff listening to Blogville citizen for any troubles…and we have a some undercover stool Roosters that have their ear to the criminal world…I then assign staff to investigate, once we have data on a potential problem.  Commissioner Sarge, Detective Mickey and myself form a plan to handle any situation. I am a hands on kinda guy…..I love getting in the middle of stuffs like this!

Funny Farmer Canines:  Are there any special policy changes you have made or intend to make during your term as Chief of Police, Sidebite?

Sidebite:  No, not really…I pretty well carry on what Sarge started…other then I have built a large underground , undercover operation to root out the criminals of Blogville. Along with the wonderful job of Deputy Top Cop Ranger, a Junior Officer Training Program was started this year, which will train the youngsters to become Full Patrol Officers, and take over one day.

Funny Farmer Canines:  Mickey, you are the North American Detective for Blogville.  What does your job entail?

Mickey:  Well, my main duties are to investigate ANYTHING going on in North America….guess you might say I am the ears to the ground listening to our stool roosters for information…..along with the other Detectives, we are the ones keeping Sidebite busy…..we do the dirty work. I also fly Sidebite around in one of the Blogville Police Helicopters for various functions.

Funny Farmer Canines:  Susie, do you assist either of your brothers with their work?  If not, what do you like to do to keep busy?

Susie:  Well, understand please, Sidebite is my guy and I am his “Sweetie Petunia”.  We are not related but we been together since I was one year old…….and good old Mickey is Sidebite’s half-brother. I don't help in the police stuff….I pretty much run the household, even the peeps…see, I am just one stubborn little gal. Keeping busy is not hard for ME…I run and Bark at everything….it’s awful busy being out in the country keeping all the stuffs around us in line!


Funny Farmer Canines:  Tell us a little about the area where you live.

Susie:  Ohhhhhhh, this is the best part.  See, we live outside of the Oklahoma City area in a small town…….we have over an acre of property….and we are next to the little electrical substation and a full 20 acre farm right to the back. They gots cows, horses, chickens and a Rooster that drives Bites nuts. The horses come to the back and visit us sometimes, and across the road are like 87 cows and bulls……oh, doggies, are they fun to bark at. To the other side is our small neighborhood.

Funny Farmer Canines:  What kind of mischief do you each prefer in your spare time?

Susie:  Well lest see. Bites, now he is a barking machine…..he likes to catch birds….well, he tries. He ain’t that fast anymore. He loves roaming in Dads shop and carrying off rags and tools. He will drag away anything he can. Dad calls him a hoarder!

OH MY, Mickey, he is just the house jester, will grab anything and play keep away….Oh, and he is a tennis Ball FREAK….always carrying one around. His best trick is stealing food off of the table and plates….the little booger jumps in a chair and gets on the table……..Peeps have to not get up and leave stuff setting around!

As for ME….well I am the Number One barker, rodent chaser, rabbit chaser…Dad is always finding little chewed packages around the yard….but the best little thing is, I am so good at ignoring Mom and Dad when they call ME…I just sit down and look at them….they try to come and get ME, I run, wag my tail and sit down again, over and over, till I decide to go to them!

Funny Farmer Canines:  If we asked your mom what she loves most about each of you, what do you think she would reply?

Susie:  Well, I guess it would be the same for each of us, it’s that we are so stubborn, after all we are very much Scotties with a Scottie-tude. But most of all we love them, want to be with them, and we know they love us, and Dad says their lives would not be the same without us.

Funny Farmer Canines:  Please stop by their blog and let Susie, Sidebite and Shadow know how grateful you are Sidebite and Shadow are working so hard to protect Blogville while Susie protects their homestead.